Black mothers hate their daughters 😒

Posted on by JustAskMaia

There is this deep-rooted question that [black] people dont ask but want to know the answer to.

Why are these mothers raising their daughters but loving their sons.

More directly, why are mothers so hard on their daughters but coddling their sons.

For a long time, I felt that. Many women attribute it to mothers being jealous of their daughters whilst being gentle on their sons and allowing them to be all over the place (both physically and emotionally).

When I was a single mother. I coddled the hell out of my boy as a single mother. So I thought I knew. I was like, yeah, we do do that. But maturing and now raising 12 children with a husband ( their father). I see this differently.

As a woman, a mom, I am made to be gentle, nurturing, loving, embracing, and encouraging. That’s what I do. But, with daughters, it’s not competition. It is being firm with my daughters so they don’t make my mistakes. I have wisdom now. But I talk to them and explain it. Some of our mothers didn’t know how to do that. Their love came out frustrated because they were scared for you. This world will eat our girls alive. I talk to my girls about every mistake I ever made, and I remind them that they will make some as well, probably repeating some of mine. But it’s okay, never feel like you can’t come to me and we will work it out. That’s how life works. But see, some of our mothers didn’t have that, so they don’t know what that looks like, and some of our mothers may still be traumatized by the stigmas placed on them because of their mistakes.

Having a husband and very present father shows me even more that I am doing it right. Because I do love on my boys hard. But their father is there to get them on the path to manhood. That’s not my job. I can teach my sons many things, but how to be his own man is not one of them. Sure, I can teach him to be the man I want…. read that again. I can give him the descriptions and attributes of what I believe a man should be, but that’s molding him into a man for a woman like me. What if that’s not the woman he wants?

I tell this story about my oldest.
I potty trained him, but I could not convince him to pee standing up (he was potty trained at 1). One day, a girlfriend of mine said her husband could watch him. I needed a sitter and usually wound up taking him to work. This man watched my son for 4 hours, and when I picked him up, he was standing and peeing. He said he only needed to show him 1x.

As a mother, it is my duty to raise my daughters and love my sons. It is my husband’s job to raise his sons and love his daughters. This is the beauty of family. It comes with balance. I never have to be told Happy fathers Day because I am a mom. Even when I was raising my boy, I was only capable of being his mom.

We have lost balance because of the bickering and anger of feeling dupes, excluded, and betrayed by a lover only to be left holding the diaper bag. It’s hard, I know. But we have to be open to playing our roles and allowing the other parent to play theirs. This is how we create well- rounded individuals to lead our future.

This is what self accountability looks like. And I’m sure someone will drag me or adamantly disagree, and that’s fine. But I’m not going to argue with you. If you disagree, share it with your own commentary.

This is my FAMILY thought for the day.
You’re welcome. ❤️

Did you miss me? Yes, you did. Stop lying.

Posted on by JustAskMaia

I have been on a wave of growth doing exactly what I teach my clients to do, and that’s tap into your capabilities. We are so used to running off of our abilities because it’s safe, it’s what we know, but there’s no growth there. Sure, you may get a promotion or recognition, but you maintain this feeling of “coasting ” through life, never experiencing what the world has to offer you.

So aside from working with a city, I know, MAJOR , right! I have also been aiming to sink my business claws onto a new venture. That is so exciting to me because I literally love it yet never considered venturing into this business sector. I’m in the process of awwing him into why I am the best person for the job. PLUS, as you know, I have been working on my book release (no date yet) called Children Ruin Everything, and I got my first review! It’s a good review, too!

Hopefully, with so much restructuring and growth happening, I will still be able to push and get this book out soon.

I just recently came back from poaching in San Diego with the plans of expanding our office there. Now, with this new city as a client, I may need to open an office there as well. I am traveling north next weekend (location not disclosed but I’ll tell you why later) to see what I can get into business wise there. 😉

The children have settled into being in school but I’m pretty sure this will be their first and last year in the public school system although them going to school has been serving its purpose of giving me a little more flex time to do business in the blink of an eye. Next year I am going to hire full time teachers to come in and teach so I know they are staying on track without losing my own momentum.

Anyway. Do you guys want to see the review? Of course you do.

“Kids Ruin Everything is a heartwarming and candid memoir written by Maisha Rush, a wife and homeschooling mother of twelve children. The book highlights how children have a tendency to ruin all the plans you had for life in a positive way, even when you can’t see it as you go through the experience. Maisha shares her personal experiences as a mother, from the challenges she faced in raising a large family to the joys and triumphs that come with it.

Through witty anecdotes and relatable stories, Maisha offers an inviting and lighthearted look into the ups and downs of parenthood. By sharing her own experiences, Maisha offers readers the encouragement and reassurance that they need to navigate the exciting yet often challenging world of parenting.

As Maisha mentions in the book, it’s not uncommon for parents to feel as though they’re giving more than they ever expected yet receiving more than they ever thought possible. Through addressing the difficulties that come with parenthood, she shares the joys and happiness that come with it, revealing how children have a beautiful way of making everything better.

As the title suggests, Kids Ruin Everything is not a book that sugarcoats the realities of being a parent. Maisha doesn’t hide the fact that raising a family can be challenging. From sleepless nights and temper tantrums to constant messes and unexpected surprises, the book offers a refreshing and honest take on the ups and downs of raising children.

Yet, despite the challenges that come with raising children, Maisha shows how it all works out for the best. She writes about the love and support she received from her children, as well as the great sense of satisfaction and accomplishment that comes from being a full-time parent. Maisha reminds readers that children are often the biggest blessings in life, as they bring joy, vitality, and love to everything they touch.

Kids Ruin Everything is an uplifting and honest memoir that offers a refreshing and relatable perspective on parenting. Maisha’s lighthearted anecdotes and relatable stories make for an entertaining read, while the underlying message of hope and encouragement will resonate with parents everywhere. Parents will be inspired and motivated to persevere through the challenges of raising children, knowing that the rewards of parenthood are immeasurable, life-changing, and worth it all. I LOVE the way Maisha captivates the audience through her honesty and relatability. Even though I do not have 12 children, she makes me feel like she shares in my struggles and I in hers. This book has made me re-think a lot of what I do and how I approach raising my own family while reminding me not to forget about myself and my goals. It is absolutely possible to have ‘all the things I want the way I want them, now’. “

🤗 come through, ME!!!!! 👏🏾

Oh!!! Did I mention that I was asked to speak at the College of Charleston through their Upward Bound program? My topic is H.U.G.E. Communication focuses on how to maintain good communication with your college bound child.

🎶 look at me know🎶

Who knew this would be my life as I started this company from a helpless place and now I get to share and enjoy the journey with so many others.

Thank you for ALL of your support whether it’s reading my blogs, watching my youtubes/tiktoks/television interviews or gassing me up along the way all the way to booking and hiring me as you business consultant or coach. THANK YOU.

Trouble on the blue app

Posted on by JustAskMaia

Whew. Who knew I could be so popular 😅

I recently ran an ad on Facebook and I had racists coming out of the woodwork for my neck. Don’t worry, I got receipts. One guy called me a diversity hire ” swooping in at a time when people don’t have any money”. WHO doesn’t have money? Listen, if you’re broke just say that. 😳 Another guy went on to talk about how trump was up in the polls. This concerns me how? We already knew his numbers would jump given his general target audience. 🤷🏾 It’s crazy. Then I have people jumping down my throat about my stance on the writers strike and I don’t know why because I support the strike. I just wish they would be able to read the fine print in their contracts so they can seek a better deal.

Either way, the talks, chatter, and disses only bring me more visibility and that is what made me keep my cool. Cause inside I wanted to say a few choice words but I wanted to remain professional because the success of my brand and my business is what I am after. Period.

Even before the shenanigans it has been a rollercoaster of a week. For those that don’t know, I registered my children for public school and for all but one of them, my senior, that have never been in that setting so there was plenty of confusion the first week but we made it through. Hopefully we start off on the good foot tomorrow and from there on.

I met with a radio exec who wants me to come on his show and talk about black businesses and their growth. I also did an interview for insider magazine so I’ll let you know when that drops. I signed a new client and also, I am back in the grant writing game for another client. So this week has been a whirlwind of emotions but I am so very grateful through it all.

I need to record a podcast tomorrow and write a blog for Rush Consulting Firm, which I must say is doing phenomenal. My advice for you this week is let the noise be loud but don’t let it get to you.

Harpo! Who dis woman?

Posted on by JustAskMaia

Never planned on having children.
I was LOVING my life, free.
Never planned on marriage (obviously because I got that shit wrong TWICE!) 🤣
NEVER wanted a house because I enjoyed being unstable. It was fun for me to hop city to city checking out scenes and meeting new people.
And an entrepreneur?!? TRASH!

SO, imagine me meeting this gentle guy swooning over me (not new 😜) and trying to make me his wife. Like EW! No sir, bye sir. 😂 Having a plethora of children, buying a home, and starting a business. Bruh. Who IS this girl?

I self sabotaged at every turn without even realizing it. My anxiety was always through the roof and my tolerance level was lower than the depths of hell, and I was okay with that.

My life was CHAOTIC!

I had to learn that the life I was living was destructive (if you want deets on that life read “self accountability” in my blogs) and that I did deserve better. But how was I suppose to do that? Transition my life of coping to a life I controlled?

Schedules and planning. This is why I know that in order to have positive affective consistency, you have to plan it out. Take control. What you put out is exactly what you get back so be intentional. Plan it out.
Grab your planner from http://www.RushConsultingFirm.com
*90 day Business planner *Social Media planner *Marketing planner *Financial planner *Funding planner and *NEW* mini Phenomenal Mommy planner. These planners have helped myself and my clients tremendously and they will help you too. Click the link. You deserve all the things you want the way you want them NOW.

Happy Monday.

How do YOU get “in the mood”?

Posted on by JustAskMaia

Well, I’m a morning person so It may be different for you.

First thing I do, obviously, is wash my face and brush my teeth. I take a few minutes to meditate and stretch to get my body ready. Releasing any tension is very import because I feel you get your best outcome in a relaxed state. I usually have tension in my hips, especially being pregnant so stretching is very important.

Next thing I’ll do is watch a video or look at some pictures to really get in the mood because although I am a morning person, I rarely just wake up in the mood. I still need motivation to get going sometimes, even some fresh ideas. You gotta keep it fresh right. Doing the same thing over and over again isn’t fun. Afterwards I will wake McRush so we can shower, usually me first, so we are clean and ready for the day. We usually get right to it because we get up before the children so there is that time of peach and quiet so we find our groove better.
We opt to work in tighter spaces so their is a flow but we will be expanding in a few weeks so we will have more space. I’m excited to see what that looks like for us.

Despite what some people think working with your spouse is really great especially when you know your roles and how important they are. Running our business together has been great for us, but just like anything else, setting the mood is very important to a positive and efficient workflow.

How do YOU get in the mood to work on your business?
😜

10 kids too many.

Posted on by JustAskMaia

You know the worst part of having 10 children is the fact that people equate more children with bad. People are amazed when we go in public that our children are well mannered and behaved. For me my children are busy but still behaved. As a homeschooling mother to a house full of children, I’m not going to lie, it can get overwhelming under certain circumstances like being short on funds but that has nothing to do with them and everything to do with me.

I am disheartened at how some people, usually family, will discredit my ability to parent by finding something to fault me about when growing up with my children. I don’t like to say raise them because in many aspects they teach me. We have a reciprocal relationship opposed to a dictatorship. You will never find fault in our ability to “raise” our children. We do our best and that’s all we can do. That’s all anyone can do.

We keep ourselves private for this very reason. Its funny how that can trigger someone to look down on you.

Everyone who knows me knows that I love love and laughing. I am not controversial. I will often choose your feelings over mine to keep the peace. And I am always sincere in what I do. I am the biggest crybaby in private and simply quiet and composed in public. I hate to be the center of attention and will boost anybody up. I am a gentle soul, connected to other’s pains often trying to fix things. I think before I speak and I never take a bet I could possibly lose. Family is everything but mine comes first. I spend most of my brain power trying to fix a situation that should have long ago died.

At this point I am so mentally drained. McRush and I have managed to create our own village and I don’t know why I fight so hard to be apart of any other one. I guess I’m just so simple that I cannot comprehend why love isn’t simpler.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all could let one another be who they are they way they wanted to be. Gently nudging them when we see them off track. Hugging when needed, space likewise.

All of my life all I ever asked and prayed for was to be happy. I guess I should have asked that those who love me be happy for me too.

Do you find it hard to be happiest when others around you aren’t happy for you?

10 kids too many.

Posted on by JustAskMaia

You know the worst part of having 10 children is the fact that people equate more children with bad. People are amazed when we go in public that our children are well mannered and behaved. For me my children are busy but still behaved. As a homeschooling mother to a house full of children, I’m not going to lie, it can get overwhelming under certain circumstances like being short on funds but that has nothing to do with them and everything to do with me.

I am disheartened at how some people, usually family, will discredit my ability to parent by finding something to fault me about when growing up with my children. I don’t like to say raise them because in many aspects they teach me. We have a reciprocal relationship opposed to a dictatorship. You will never find fault in our ability to “raise” our children. We do our best and that’s all we can do. That’s all anyone can do.

We keep ourselves private for this very reason. Its funny how that can trigger someone to look down on you.

Everyone who knows me knows that I love love and laughing. I am not controversial. I will often choose your feelings over mine to keep the peace. And I am always sincere in what I do. I am the biggest crybaby in private and simply quiet and composed in public. I hate to be the center of attention and will boost anybody up. I am a gentle soul, connected to other’s pains often trying to fix things. I think before I speak and I never take a bet I could possibly lose. Family is everything but mine comes first. I spend most of my brain power trying to fix a situation that should have long ago died.

At this point I am so mentally drained. McRush and I have managed to create our own village and I don’t know why I fight so hard to be apart of any other one. I guess I’m just so simple that I cannot comprehend why love isn’t simpler.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all could let one another be who they are they way they wanted to be. Gently nudging them when we see them off track. Hugging when needed, space likewise.

All of my life all I ever asked and prayed for was to be happy. I guess I should have asked that those who love me be happy for me too.

Do you find it hard to be happiest when others around you aren’t happy for you?

👀 hello?

Posted on by JustAskMaia

Almost 38 weeks pregnant and I am over it. Also, I am over the affects that Covid is having on my business. Things are shaping up but also taking a toll. Who knew.

I haven’t been checking in because nothing is really going on. I always want to blog but there a lot of you-had-to-be-there moments so they don’t convey well via blog. For this reason I have been considering vlogging, especially after the baby is born. It will be simpler.. I heard that. Yes, vlogging will be simpler because I do not plan on editing at all. It will be the RushBunch raw and uncut. I really hope you’re ready for that. I will be BUT commenting will be turned off cause I’m not so saved anymore and my quick flip of the lip is not so holy. I don’t want to embarrass McRush. 😜

The baby’s name is Maia, yup, kinda like me but most of you know that’s a nickname. She will be born at home with hubby and doula by my side. While I am excited about the birth, not so much about the healing time. I just hate sitting around. The plan this time is to spend a few days at home and then check into a hotel for peace and quiet. Yes, Maia will be there. That’s the plan but I foresee it not happening. Yesterday I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed in the room locked away to rest but all I could think about was my babies. 🙄 Being a parent is a set up. We say we want a break but when we get it our minds are consumed with their wellbeing. Trash! Also, if anyone knows a remedy to ease Braxton hicks please share in the comments because at this point I’m like, are you coming or naw? 😐

iRush

Mama needs a break

Posted on by JustAskMaia

🗣️ LISTEN!

Mama needs a break! I don’t care judge me. Raising a house full of children, running a busy firm, 33 weeks pregnant, DURING covid19. BRUH!

God wakes me up every morning at 6:48 and refuses to tell me why so I am forced to just be up and productive. 🙄 When I do get to go to bed around midnight, if I’m lucky, baby decides NOW is the best time to do the Macarena on my bladder. I am constantly asking the ancestors what I did in my past life to subject my current life to such umcooperativeness ← yes I know that’s not a word Leave 👏🏾 me 👏🏾 alone 👏🏾!

Between black lives Matter being an actual issue, trump being somebody’s president (not mine) and countries shutting us out of their world, I SWEAR I am living in the book 1984 by George Orwell. Is this really the matrix or am I being punked like Jim Carrey in The Truman Show? I’m no conspiracy theorist but come on now! What gives? I’m also not religious (any more) but I’m this close 👌🏾 to looking up and declaring I see Jesus in the sky. Lord take me nah!

Sweet baby Jesus lying in a manger, what is going on and what did I bring my children into. This has GOT to be a sin. What did God say to me to convince me to THIS? It was a setup. No way He told this all to me and I was like “Yeah! That sounds hella dope, sign me up G!” Naw. Not buying it. G got jokes and I’on think they’re funny.

What are you guys doing to keep sane? No foreal, I need tips. Speak up!!

Is my living in vain?

Posted on by JustAskMaia

In the midst of this dark cloud lingering over my head, I am forced to work through tears shed.

No matter what I am doing, in the blink of an eye, I will find myself crying. I snickered to myself appreciating the fact that I do not wear make up. What a waste it would be right now.

Funny, no matter what we go through as parents we still must be sure our children are living their best life. For me that is forcing a smile with uncertainties lingering like a lone cloud on a sunny day.

Isn’t it ironic how we do so many good deeds and it feels, sometimes, as though they measure up to nothing? I remember when I was a young girl, my mom told be to be sure that my good far outweighed my bad. I literally live by that staple. Yet, I now find myself perplexed as to why.

Why then, do I still endure such unbelievable pain? Why is it life seems a constant test? When the heck is the exam so I can pass already!

I don’t know everything there is to know about life, but I do know this, its yours to live. Choose happiness and pass it on.

I’ll tell you what. When my daughter passed away I no longer took each moment I had with my children for granted. Not that I ever did but every breath seems even more previous to me. That is part of my reason for homeschooling. I always say that God has given me a charge (or 10) and I take that charge very seriously. These are little people who will soon try to find their own place in the world. It is my job to assist them as much, and as early, as possible.

Does my heart hurt every morning? Absolutely.

Do I have butterflies since this incident. Always.

But it will not stop my unwavering love and care. I push through, as we all do.

Am I always going to get it right? Nope.

Is my living in vain. Of course not.