I haven’t blogged in the last two Sundays because I have been in a rut. I don’t really know why but my head just hasn’t been in the game. Due to this, work has piled up, my children are completely off schedule, and I think I may be depressed.
When I get like this everything shuts down, including my body. For those who don’t know, I suffer from nephrocalcinosis. It’s debilitating within my kidneys. It causes me to pee blood. I know, tmi. But I am dedicated to always being transparent and honest in a way that shows my weak points so that those that follow me know that I too am human.
We got my nephew back. Cps took him away from my brother and his wife again. Having him back is alot. Dealing with the ramifications of having someone else’s child, seized unwillingly can cause a strain on the entire family. Including mine. McRush doesn’t want to go through that again, understandably, but I cannot have him in a system that will only create another statistic.
Mentally I am going through alot, business is not great right now so money is tight. Like TIGHT. I am pretty optimistic that we will get through all of this, even my internal battles but I cannot help but wonder when.
My oldest just joined the Marines and he leaves next month. That’s pretty stressful although I am extremely proud of him. You can never gage the outcome of the world and where he will end up though. He’s my first born, my baby. I know you are reading this and thinking “you have to let hem grow up”, and I am it’s just a scary world out there and I just want to protect him from the things I can’t protect him from.
Life is kinda all over the place but I am hoping I can shift things back to a normal soon.
For a long time I wouldn’t invest in my business and did everything myself. I signed up for free newsletters and ebooks, webinars and classes just to sit and separate what I could use now, or later. What was a good idea, what was meant for me, and what could make me money NOW. The truth is, I lost so much more than money trying to “save” money. I was nickel and diming my dreams and couldn’t even get a handle on a clear vision because all of the free stuff I consumed had me off track. I had to take a step back and realign myself with what I wanted and where I wanted to be THEN I could create a plan of action of how to get there. But, I still needed help. I still needed those “freebies”. Wrong. I needed to invest in systems and information that was specifically catered to my goals. That’s what consulting is. Helping you get your business on track and scale. Throughout this confusing process of trying to consume any and everything I could get my hands on to build my brand. I lost my vision in the process. I couldn’t hear my own voice and I began to compare my progress, or lack thereof, to the people I was taking “free” advice from. I had to step back and gather my thoughts. I hired my own coach to keep me on track and motivated. That’s what coaching is. Many people know that I made zero dollars on my business until about 3 years after I started. Even then, the next two years I made less than $10,000 per year. It wasn’t until I invested in the systems and people I knew would take me where I was trying to go. Now making over 10x what I was I learned that there is no secret to success. Just the right work and it doesn’t have to be hard.
See I teach you what I know and what I have been through. I not only have the expertise and education but I have the experience. I teach because I have been there. I show up to be the person I needed when I was where you are.
I am a wife and homeschooling mom of 12 who has been through it all and yet, here I am. Making more than 10x what I was and enjoying every moment of it. If you’re following me on social media you’d probably think I didn’t do anything except snap pictures of my family. I mean, I do, but I also run a very successful brand. I say all that to say, invest in the help you know you need. It will pay off. Trust me.
This is a post that I shared years ago. It was at this moment I made the shift to be who I am while working on the goals I aimed to accomplish. I hope it sets a spark in you like it did for me.
Stop breaking everything.
Today, I set out to reconfigure something i created that was perfectly fine. It was already set up and the process was working very well. But I took this thing and mentally tore it apart to see if I could make it “better” (that’s what I told myself). And then it hit me. I self sabotage. I can take a well oiled machine and swear it needs water. But why? As I thought over some moments passed, I realized I have done this almost all my life. Its a horrible thing to do to myself. In fact, I have never ever sabotaged anyone else I know…. just myself. It was in this mornings moment I realized, for whatever reason, I am sometimes afraid to be great. What if people think I am stuck up? What if people see me as if I think am better than them. Smh. What an epiphany. #OutTheBox
Affirmation There is nothing wrong with being great.
I have bad news for you guys. You know that I’m an advocate for fuck these kids and live your best life because I believe that you deserve all the things you want the way you want them now but baby girl. That shit is not going to just fall in your lap. You’re going to have to work for it and imma tell you now, motherhood is a beast and it can and will be overwhelming buy just like you planned your babies birthday party, your beat friends bridal shower, and your wedding; you’re going have to have that same can-do energy when it comes to building a life of ease and comfort. I never promised it would be easy no matter how easy you think I make it look. Imma be upfront, as always, this shit is hard and some days you’re gonna want a vicodin or a blunt because the way the constant consistency of showing up gets twitchy… biiiiitch. This ain’t for the faint of heart. Some days you are going to feel like you are everything to everybody and others you’re gonna be like Lord what was I thinking. But the in between is much more present. I’m telling you this because I want you to know that you are not alone and whether you have 1 child or 15 it’s not always easy. This is why I teach moms that they have a right to be selfish in their career, in their business, and even in their lives because raising children does not stop at 18 and the worry never goes away. I want to remind you of how strong and capable you are because you still show up. Just remember it’s okay to take a rest. Them kids ate yesterday. They’ll be alright. 藍 🤣
This week pushed me, exhausted me, tried me, reminded me, and lit a fire under me.
I don’t even know how to put this week into words because it has been a roller-coaster of emotions. My family had me rethinking why I would even come here. Like, whatever I did in my past life, I’m sorry. Ava is going through her terrible twos except she is almost 4. Maia is very whiney, as she should be because she IS about to turn two. Kera is still every two hours and doesn’t care for anything but breastmilk. Sara is going through a mean streak. Bella, the preteen that she is, is going through a “don’t bother me” phase. My boys don’t know the difference between inside and outside. This goes for voice, mannerisms and actions. My oldest is dating a girl who belittles and berates him on a daily basis and I cannot for the life of me figure out why. It makes me sad because I never talk to him that way and he has certainly never heard his father and I speak to each that way. They stress me the hell out and I’m not a part of their relationship.
One of my clients hired a consultant in addition to me but I don’t think she knew exactly what the offer entailed but it has created more work for me. Another client is flakey as fuck when it comes to showing up both for herself and me and you already know how much I hate my time being wasted so. I am finally adding more systems so I can flow more smoothly on Rush Consulting Firm which means I need to spend more money and I don’t like that.
We have finally managed to track down and buy helmets for all three boys in football. During this time of the year they are slim pickings. I mean people charging three hundred and fifty bucks for a used one because the sports stores don’t have them. My sister had a birthday party for my brother in love which was a great way to destress and have fun. First Bella had Ballet, then the girls had to be at a birthday party which ended just in time to take the boys to their fun day with their teams. Afterward is when we spent 2 hours tracking down helmets and driving around town to get them. THEN we went to my sister’s party which by then I was spent. I still managed to have a couple drinks. McRush had to make a run and pretty much forgot about me so when I was ready to go I had to wait. (This was all Saturday). This morning my great friend asked me to brunch where I sat in a room with 4 other phenomenal women and we shared some of our most sacred feelings and vulnerable moments. We encouraged and uplifted one another and we laughed, ALOT. I had a wonderdul time.
Overall this week was exactly what people assume my life looks like all the time and I am so glad that they are wrong.
Hi. My name is Maisha Rush and I am inconsistent af with my blog🤦🏾♀️
People who come in a meeting a couple minutes late or miss a deadline are so apologetic to me but I get it. Life happens. And it’s aggravating but what I have learned is that I cannot control what happens around me. My job is to be as organized as I can so when a bump in the road happens it may slow me down but it doesn’t stop the show. I also know that sometime you need a reset and that’s just what I did this weekend. My brother had a surprise engagement party (congratulations) so we drove down to Florida. I had about 3 shots 2 beers and a mixed drink. I danced like I was 21 and I took time to enjoy myself. I had to quit my business and act a while entire fool this weekend and I loved wcwry minute of it. Before we headed back the family went to breakfast and hit the road. (By the way dad you still have my Arizona much mango drink).
I know your business is important to you and you need it to be successful but don’t forget to show out too even if that looks like a book or a movie binge. Remember, without a happy health you, your business won’t succeed anyhow.
This week I was given alot of praise and accolades for my works. It could not have come a better time because I have been drowning in everything. It’s been a prosperous week but trying to keep up with myself has been exhausting. I recently integrated the discipline of abandoning my phone for a set amount of hours…. or days. It has been so stress relieving. Additionally I have embraced the power of “no” and let me tell you, I feel like a new woman. I am sad that it took me 42 years to get here. I previously added no to my vocabulary but it carried so much guilt that I could hardly stick to it and when I did I oftentimes beat myself up over it or over compensated which made less sense. No is my new cuss word and abandoning my phone is my new vacation.
I recently listened to a vlog I did a few weeks back. I normally don’t listen to my stuff because, like most of us, I hate to hear myself back because I critique every little thing. 🙃 But this vlog was about depression and how we need to find the space for ourselves to just feel and be okay with that. In that, I reminded myself that the world is not going to crumble if I stand still for a moment. So I am being more intentional in that.
Outside of being more selfish there isn’t much more to report. My summer weeks are full due to several extra activities picked up by the bunch. Fridays and Sundays are my only free days so those are most likely the days I will turn my phone off and lock into a good book.
The children are good. McRush is good. Business is good. Thanks for checking in.
This was my mantra last week. I have been over run, over worked, overwhelmed and honey I am over it this week. 🙃
I am so proud of my growth because this time last year, hell this time last month, my cup was empTEE! I didn’t know up from down or left from right. All I knew was I was going and I was going quickly and continuously. I realized that is definitely for the birds. This weekend I slept in, luckily Kera got the memo. I woke up fed and changed the baby and skipped my ass right out the door to get my nails and brows done. I think it’s been a year since I got my nails AND toes done. I was gone for a few hours and when I came back, I got me a red bull and pretended nobody existed. I was having a selfish moment and it felt goodT.
Whew. I started this week off fresh. And I am loving it. I do owe you guys a “whoops” because you know I was supposed to blog yesterday and forgot. I can’t say I’m sorry because I’m not and yall know I don’t say that anyway. 😜 But, I should have stuck to my obligation and blogged because I have a few new followers so I have to put on my “ack right”. 😅
I really do appreciate you guys and I hope that you know that you too are worth an irresponsible splurge day too. 💗
And in perfect summertime fashion, I am going in a diet. SIKE 🤣🤣🤣. Summer gonna get the body I give it baby. I’m talking rolls and jiggles from everything that wiggles 😂
Seriously though. I have hit the 3 month mark with Kera so I am working on moving more and being more intentional with my eating because I don’t want to be fluffy anymore. 🙃 My babies are getting older so they want me to play with them more. I am good about getting up and moving I just need to be reminded sometimes. The other day we were at a big field with hills and they were rolling. I was watching, laughing, and snapping pictures 📸 they invited me to roll and while I was like nah, that’s a Thunda Roll. 😁 But I gotta show up for my babies so I rolled my ass down that hill and it was so nostalgic. Those are the things I don’t want to miss out on.
Don’t get me wrong I’m a sexy thickum but I can definitely stand to live a healthier lifestyle. So that’s what I am doing.
As I scale Rush Consulting Firm I slowly slid to forgetting about me. That’s the thing about going after your dreams and being intentional about your goals, it can be hard to find the balance because it really doesn’t exist. But if you plan on purpose and move on purpose, you can still live your best life, on purpose. That’s the thing that people oftentimes forget, Life is work but it’s worth it. You can’t let life happen to you. You have to happen to life.
This week has really been a blur. Everything happening so fast and just constantly moving. 😫 I couldn’t tell you what happened this week if I tried. Obviously Kera isn’t sleeping through the night at just 3 months so sleep just hasn’t happened yet. I’m up about every hour and half to two hours. I really couldn’t tell you the last time I slept through the night and I honestly can’t wait to.
I have a couple of clients who keep me up at night as well configuring the logistics of their business. I like that part though. It keeps my mind fresh. That’s what I loved about going to school for law, I was always researching. I probably should be a research analyst. It’s my passion.
It’s funny though; I need my own business manager. I have been reaching out to bigger firms for mentoring but once companies get big they are less apt to tell their secrets to success because I could, and hopefully will, turn out to be a competitor. In 5 years I want to have the firm complete with in house consultants and coaches. I made the mistake of hiring my previous consultants too quickly and honestly didn’t know how to train them properly. The problem is I cannot train someone to be me and my firm is known by my ability to be quick on my feet to solve client problems right now.
That’s where I hit a roadblock and shut down. I like being known by my name and the abilities that come with it and I am afraid that hiring some one who is unable to be as swift as me tarnishing the brand. Sometimes I think thats big headed of me but other times I just feel like it’s confidence. I am always humble but sure. I never take a bet I may lose.
I have alot to think about when it comes to the firm and the direction I really want to go in. It consumes me. Between that and raising a family of my size I am mentally exhausted. I decided that it’s time to see a therapist. I reached out to some one so we will see how that goes. I also have alot of tension from the entire process but I refuse to see a massage therapist because of my body confidence, or lack thereof. This is how we hinder ourselves. We over think things and let them slide or push them to the back burner. And while I advise against those thoughts to my clients, I lack in taking my own advice.
I did actually get dressed up and went to a dinner party with McRush. It was nice, for me but not really his cup of tea. Were like oil and water there. While we go along to indulge in one another’s passions we haven’t quite found our thing. He’s more reserved and laid back whereas I like to go out and do things that are more community. We were raised pretty differently from status to lifestyle. My mom and dad are social butterflies and his mom was very churchy. But, in the years we have been together we have learned to mesh very well together.
This week I plan to be more intentional and less reserved due to the image I have of myself. Also, to try to get more sleep. Lol.
What about you? What’s on your agenda for the week?