Whew..what a day!

My sister got married today. I did not help her like I should have. I feel pretty bad about that. I have been trying to think of ways that I can make it up to her in the near future. She is my baby.

Juggling life, family, business, and school is a lot but its still no excuse.

What a hectic day. My feet hurt like hell AND I cannot WAIT to let my head hit this pillow.

I got dolled up today. I hate being dolled up because for me its just another task to tackle everyday but I must say, it came out very well. I may have to figure out this make up thing and try to incorporate it. My oldest son didn’t like it. Well, he said he liked it but it wasn’t the me he is used to. He also does not like makeup so take that into consideration.

I am so happy for my sister and I do not think I could love another man for my sister. He has the brightest personality but can be very serious. He is an entrepreneur (you KNOW I love that!) He also works (Go ahead King!) most importantly he treats my sister with utmost respect and love. I have been calling him BIL (Brother In Law) for years and now he is my brother.

But let me take a minute to dote all over my sisters best friend, Jazz. I’m not putting her real name because 1. She is not getting paid to be in my blog. ๐Ÿ˜œ 2. Y’all might try to steal her like I have considered several times. ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿพ This woman is the epitome of best friend. Like, in the dictionary, beside nest friend is this beautiful smiling black goddess named Jas Jazz. (You almost got me!) I swear she has had my sisters back through everything and when I say she stepped in!

Listen! I love her simply for the reason that she has my sisters best interest at heart and she acts on it, DAILY. I love you Jazz. I know you read my blogs because you are so dope! ๐Ÿ‘€

I just wanted to say congratulations to my sister and brother on sealing the deal today.

I am posting a crappy shot because I did not get permission to post pictures of their day yet. But know that I love you Gabrielle, forever and always.

-Big Sis

(I was standing outside the window stealing pics)๐Ÿ˜‚

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Dang.

Well. I was on a roll. I missed yesterday. ๐Ÿ˜ถ

My mom is in town. ๐ŸŽ‰

My sister is getting married tomorrow. Watching her go through the stress of planning a wedding make a me even more satisfied that I eloped. All three times. The benefit of it? Family comes to celebrate with you. If you like that sort of thing.

The RushBunch has been pretty relaxed in their schooling this week. I was hosting a contracts class this week and they were in reading and worksheets heaven. โ†That’s sarcasm. They HATE doing worksheets. They much rather learn by me teaching.

I need a nanny. Business ventures are picking up and I do not want to stretch myself thin.

For next week. Its learning on the go! I have a few business meet ups on the docket and they will learn on-the-go. History is pretty much the only thing you can teach while driving. An social studies but they don’t like social studies much so History it is.

This is one of the reasons I absolutely love homeschooling. If I weren’t id be subject to pick up and drop off hours then traffic. Nah.

If you are an entrepreneur and have children homeschooling is the way to go, I know you may think, what about when I have a meeting? For introduction meetings I do not recommend so stash some cash and get a sitter. This is when you must be time conscious. Hold yourself accountable for a schedule and budget wisely. If its not a first time meeting. Bring something that will occupy your child and get it done.

Some people say, my child would be all over the place! I can’t take them with me! If that is your response I want you to read over that statement again and know that I say this with love.. If you do not have control of your children your business will suffer. You will constantly be stressed out over scheduling appointments around your children’s behavior and you will be rushing impromptu calls with anxiety which means your are not giving your best. I would suggest you start to take any down time and spend it with your child teaching them how important the business is to you and how it effects the family.

Running a business from home with children can be done. You have to have discipline and time management. You also have to be organized. Now it the time to learn these traits together. โค๏ธ

You know what day it is.

Surely I would not let this day go by without acknowledging you. The world is so different from what I thought it would be without you.

I expected to have someone to frill up and show off. By now a preteen surely testing the waters, its only fair because I did it to my mom.

Its scary, I think without pictures reminding me I think I may have forgotten what you look like. Do you know what I DO remember? How soft your skin was. I used to rub my face on yours. If I close my eyes I can still feel my cheek on your forehead.

Remember when we slept so close that we shared breath? That was cool. I would wake up at 2:55 every morning just to stare at you because, like clockwork, you would wake up at 3. I never met one so calm. I probably only seen you cry twice the whole time I knew you.

You stole my heart from the very first moment I met you. Oh, how you changed me. Even now.

I was laying in bed last night wishing I could hold you in my arms again. Smell you. Touch you.

I never question why you left. It just wasn’t meant to be. I know that now. Boy did it take me a long time to realize it though. Where I am now, I would not be here if you had not left. That’s a hard thing to accept.

You made me stronger. Wiser even.

We celebrate you every day. We whisper your name lest we forget. Thank you for choosing me. I don’t know why but I know there is one. So I am grateful.

Your sisters and brothers speak as if they all met you. Maybe they did, last life.

I just wanted you to know that I love you. My gift to the world on your birthday is to tell them about you. I wouldn’t be who I am where I am had you not come…and gone.

Today you would be 11. Wow. Happy birthday Madison. I love you more and more, like you never left earthside.

“If you ever ask God ‘why’ , if you listen you will hear him say, because you were going the wrong way.” -Maisha Rush

This is the look that you get.

This is the end of the day look of a wife who stayed up late to make sure she saw her husband off with his packed lunch.

The look of a woman who went to bed at 3 just to wake up at 430 because #8 woke up for a glass of water and a rock-me-back-to-sleep. The woman who jumped up at 730 to get her oldest son to work on time because he’s having car troubles.

This.

This woman who makes hot breakfast for her children every morning. Yeees. This is the woman who rushed to answer emails and finish modules for an online session she had to teach.

Here is the woman who homeschooled 8 of her 10 children while conducting conference calls. She after 3 consultations, managed to call and check in on her mom and cook dinner.

It was her that closed the deal today on a contract and changed diapers and wiped noses and tied shoes while breaking up fights and maintaining her calm reminding her children that it was love or nothing at all.

She, who after checking on clients and answering emails then taking calls from government officials still cuddled with her daughter and made jokes with friends while pushing through a migraine because she forgot to finish her breakfast ๐Ÿค” lunch?

All super heroes don’t wear capes and all days aren’t great. But make no mistake, she wouldn’t change it for the world.

She wouldn’t change it for the world.

-M

An open letter to my babies.

I hope you know that I love you with every fiber of my being. I know you know I love you but its much more than you know. I know growing up is hard. I know there are times where you have done a good thing and I didn’t make you feel like it was a good thing. There are times, I’m sure, that you have done something nice for me and it went unnoticed. I’m sorry. I know that I sometimes lose my cool and instead of talking to you I raise my voice. The words I choose are not always the best ones and as soon as they leave my mouth, I wish I could snatch them back. I know you think I’m the best mom but I know I can do better. I try to do better, some days better doesn’t come. Sometimes great lingers. But any day with you in my life is heaven. It may not always feel like I wouldn’t trade you for the world but I wouldn’t. I know that I would burn this world to ashes to keep you safe. Your happiness is my goal and some days I miss the mark but that doesn’t change how my heart beats for you. I know I want nothing but the best for you and I will breathe my last breath to make it happen. Sometimes that looks like long days. But know that even now, as you sleep, my mind is shifting trying to create ways and moments to make you smile. Nothing in this world amounts to the love I have for you. I hope you always know that, even on our worst days. You are PHENOMENAL. You are amazing. You are the reason I breathe. I love you my RushBunch. May you always know that. May you always feel that. โค๏ธ Mom.

When things fall apart.. my version.

When trouble comes your way.

Glass half empty thinker.
“The devil is trying to stop me”

Glass half full thinker.
“The universe is making sure I want it bad enough”.

So many obstacles came my way this week as I am preparing for this awards ceremony that I am already nervous about.

As an introvert it is nerve wrecking to be amongst a crowd.
As a Leo, there is a certain, shall I say, vanity that goes along with being seen. Everything must be perfect. As you can imagine, this is a hectic mix.

This week I have been battling a fever and chills. Not sick just tired. (I believe my iron may be low ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿพ). I have a swollen lip. A swollen lymph node under my arm that is painful to say the least, and now, just 5 hours away from Showtime, I have a migraine coming. This is where most people would reply “the devil blah blah blah”. But this is an irresponsible response to life. The devil’s hand isn’t IN everything. Most times it’s your poor choices in life, or simply something that came with the territory.

Let me just pause for a moment to remind you that I do not subscribe to the belief that there is a devil outside of our alter egos.

The fever and chills is because I have been pushing myself toward goals this past month or so and have not been taking proper care of myself with adequate rest and diet (in addition to a 4 vs 1 day heavy cycle).

The swollen lip, I talked about in a previous blog which actually did turn out to be a acidic reaction to something I ate.

The lymph node under my arm is also my fault as a reaction to not eating right which flares my diagnosis (I spoke about this as well).

The migraine is my anxiety. I feel like I am falling apart a.d nothing is going according to plan.

See. Self accountability with be the party pooper to any pity party (imma tweet that ๐Ÿ˜‚).

I wrote all that to say. Stop being so quick to accept responsibility for your wins but quick to blame someone else (fictional or real) for your failures.

Maybe the devil (๐Ÿ˜) isn’t trying to block you. Perhaps You aren’t doing what your supposed to do to maintain happiness in your life.

Or.

OR!

Maybe God/Universe is trying to see if you want it as bad as you say you do.

๐Ÿฅ›

Rescue 911/Calgon/Easy button/ nanny 911….

When Ayesha Curry said “Fuck them Kids!” LISTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNN! My soul cried out HALLELUJAH somebody! Ayyyyyy shananana Honda!

(This is an exaggeration of what she said because I never heard her say THOSE exact words. Buuuuut).

Now, I would never say those words to my children because I love them to life but I felt it in my spirit like the Holy ghost!

If I didn’t have McRush I would have dropped mySELF off at the fire station. Don’t judge me, Judge your mama cause she prolly felt the same way! ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

I managed to take the RushBunch to Mt Pleasant Memorial Park, very beautiful place. We had fun. I guess they got a reprieve from yesterday. Dey Aiiight.

Tomorrow is my award show and I have magically managed to acquire, what one of my clients lovingly referred to as a “bum bump”. It’s a Kevin Hart reference catch up. And no, not that kind of bump but I am sure it will be implied. (Y’all so mean ๐Ÿ˜ญ) I believe it’s a reaction to this cucumber salad I ate at this [gentrified] restaurant on Remount Rd. ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿพ

I am excited to be nominated for “woman on the Rise”, “Mentor of the Year”, and “Woman of Influence”.

Its great to be recognized and honored. Tell the universe I’m coming for what’s mine! ๐Ÿ˜

Shat!

Definitely one of those hide on the side of your bed and drink ginger Ale for breakfast kind of days.

Despite fighting a 103.5 fever for the past few day I have not missed a mommy or wife beat. Its draining. Somewhere there is always a sacrifice. Right at a high of my business, the sacrifice has been Rush Consulting Firm. I try not to come in here and vent but I choose not to tell people because I don’t want a pity party or words of encouragement. I just want to vent. It will work out, I know this.

I don’t know if I told you guys but I was recently nominated for 3 awards from Achi magazine.

Its an honor to be recognized AND i am grateful to whomever nominated me. I wish I knew who it was.

I said this to myself today and so I am sharing it with you.

“We have days where we want to give up. Tirelessly working to better ourselves and our business, oftentimes without recognition. Somebody is watching. Keep being great. Keep being you.”

The scam called adulting

God. They down here treating me mean. ๐Ÿ’†๐Ÿพ

Listen, as far as business I have been consistently elevating and that is a plus. I have been on operation hire McRush (full time) and when I say Grind ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿพ ding ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿพ! Listeeeeen. I don’t even HAVE a comfort zone to step out of anymore. ๐Ÿ˜‚

I did calculate the taxes for the year and I had a brief moment of “maybe you should slow down sis” ๐Ÿ˜

Now when I say “they” I meant the Rush Bunch. BRUH! These are some spoilT children! They think that I am their sister I SWEAR. I be like, “Who raised y’all?”.

SN: I need to hire a cleaning team but imma need them to sign a non disclosure cause people are so uncouth. ๐Ÿ˜ Anyone who comes to my house swears its clean every time, and I am not the one to clean because you’re coming over. But when you come from a dad who used to white glove inspect… it does not stay to my standards. I’m probably asking a bit much. I feel like, at this point Lady Ava should be washing the baseboards, I mean, she is the closest to the floor. ๐Ÿค”

So, homeschooling is fun ๐Ÿ˜‘. I just went to a bulk goodwill and wracked up on more learning books. People throw workbooks away that have never been used. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ Of course they were like children at Christmas. They are such nerds. But. I have decided to capitalize on their knack for knowledge. My eight year old is taking a wix class and afterwards an SEO class. Wait…. nine. Nine year old ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿพ

My super genius 7 year old is taking a marketing class. My 13 year old is studying Business Plans and the littles are in charge of promotions. They will hand business paraphernalia to ANYBODY.

I feel like its something like learning a trade. Am I pimping them out? Prolly, BUT its also beneficial for them in the future so, I’ll allow it. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Currently I am running on a regular 2-3 hours of sleep and my body has been taking note. I had company today and said I would be right back, I needed to go to the bathroom… should I say restroom? ๐Ÿค” Anyway. I came out my bathroom and inconsideration and my inability to make proper judgement calls took over and I laid in my bed. I woke up 3 hours later. Smh. Such a horrible friend. So now, at 12:34 I am wide awake but TRUST! I’m about to figure it out. I am tired!

I am implementing a few free courses in my business so have been working on the content for it. Well, let me rephrase that. I am offering a few free courses in my FB group THEN its going up for sale on my site! **get it while its hot**

If you are building a business and need help go here. If you want to take a peek in the group, it’s @iRush to Success.

Can I just mention that my children keep coming in the room even though I said go to bed at like 9 o’clock.

Them: ๐Ÿ‘€

Me: what do you need?

Them: nothing, I was just standing here.

Whaaaaaaaat?

I literally am around my children 24/7. Even when I have business meetings I usually bring them with me or they are close by.

Y’all not tired if me?!?! GUH!

He’ll โ†โ†โ†โ† No. Just. NO! (Auto correct is a Christian)

HELL! I’m tired of me. Sheesh!

I see y’all see me.

I’m just sitting here pondering. I have been up since, well I never really went to bed.

I finally got Lady Ava down at around midnight, which is when McRush had to get up for work. I chatted with him for a moment then laid in the bed. I pulled the covers up to my chest and did a little shoulder shimmy to nestle in and I hear a knock at the door, “moooom”. Le sigh.

Its Sir Ian. We are currently attempting to transition him out of the crib in our room into his toddler bed in the Littles room… its no bueno so far. ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿพ I opened the door and put him in the crib after a kiss on the cheek which means I transplant Ava into her bassinet. Lets try this again. I lift my leg to climb back into my ever so comfortable king sized bed laced with soft plush cotton pillows and I can swear its calling my name. I literally smile. ๐Ÿ˜ƒ You guys just don’t know what it means to get some sleep around here! But, alas all of my joyous feelings are snatched away with one try. Ava ๐Ÿ˜ขing.

Somehow moving her from the crib to the bassinet made her stuffy and she can’t breathe. Its going to be a long night morning.

She and I are tossing and turning after wiping her down and doing some aromatherapy. No change. I put her snug in my arm. Nope. ๐Ÿ˜‘ On my chest. Uh uh. ๐Ÿค” I sit up and hold her as she is wrapped in her blanket. She seems to be getting some relief and breathing better so I ease my way down and of course… NO. ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿพ This is an all night junction. ๐Ÿ˜ญ

You know what happens? GUESS! ๐Ÿ‘€โ†“โ†“โ†“โ†“โ†“โ†“โ†“โ†“

Ian is now stuffy. My first thought…. “What did I do to you God?”

I clear him up and lay him back down. Easy peasy, he’s back to sleep. ๐Ÿ˜ด

Knock. Knock. Knock. ๐Ÿ˜

“Mom, can I sleep in your bed”. -Sara

It’s a party apparently.

I run downstairs to make Ava some tea when I faintly hear her crying. I run back upstairs before she wakes the entire house and kill ALL of my hopes for some shut eye. I bring her downstairs with me and this gives me the opportunity to steam her from the kettle pot. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

I make her, Ian, as well as myself some tea…. They don’t like tea. โ˜• So two hours later, after force feeding an almost two year old and 7 month old warm tea. I am considering whether its worth my time and energy to attempt to lay down knowing the Bigs will be waking soon. Or cut my losses, along with a bit if my sanity, and stay awake.

This is my life. โค๏ธ