Lady Ava’s arrival

I did not realize it has been over a month since I have updated you guys on our homeschooling shenanagins but that’s not what you are here for. Later for that!

Most of you know that I wanted to homebirth Ava. I got my doula and I informed my doctor. My doctor was adamant about me not birthing at home because I recently had a cesarean and I was Group B Strep positive in addition to the necessity of needing a Rhogam shot within 24 hours of giving birth. Aside from all of that, I was still willing to trust my body and follow in the steps of my ancestors. McRush was not fully on board. There were a couple of times I almost died giving birth so I understood and recognized his fear. What I reminded him was, both times it was not my body who failed me, it was the medical facility and doctors. That did not soothe his fears but he was willing to listen to mine.

One thing about me is I hate hospitals. I hate the drawn-out process of diagnosing you, I hate the rudeness and disrespect they give you. I hate that they feel like they know more about your body than you do and I hate being away from my family for extended periods ESPECIALLY when it’s for no reason but to milk my pockets.

Now that I got my mini-rant out of the way…

On February 24 at 9:27 I was laying across my bed and I felt like I had to pee. I sat up and felt a trickle. I’m thinking, I know I didn’t have to pee that bad. But then a moment of excitement as I wondered maybe it’s my water, I immediately cleared that thought because it was not even close to enough to have been my water breaking. So I get up and head to the bathroom to be stopped by my 2-year-old to give him toothpaste. While grabbing the toothpaste I drip a few times on the floor. Now I’m like, you buggin’. I sit n the toilet to pee and reach over to clean the floor. Its gooey!

I text McRush

For the rest of the day, I am walking around with a towel between my legs because in true Ava style (stubborn) my water will not break but instead just trickles. We decide to go for a walk because I am not having any contractions and Ava is still extremely high.

Y’all I walked, went up and down the stairs, did squats, cleaned, danced, you name it. Ava’s but was still tucked comfortably in my chest! I had put off calling the doctor as long as I could. Mcrush was in my ear the entire time, I think we should call the doctor, do you think we should call the doctor, the doctor will be worried, etc. I called the doctor.

Now we were scheduled to come in that morning and get an IV of antibiotics for the strep and then they were going to break my water so the hospital had called but I ignored it. When I called the hospital, the doctor asked about my pink eye and whether I finished my medication for it. I kindly gave my husband the side eye and just that quick, he was on my side of home birthing. Why? I did not, nor have I ever had pink eye.

The entire day goes by and still, no contractions and Ava is still tucked in “high”ness position.. my chest.

12 hours later, I decide to look up how long you have to give birth after your water breaks because I had stopped trickling fluids about 9:45 p.m. It said 12-24 hours, I was still safe.

Around 10, contractions started but they were more like Braxton hicks because they were sporadic and oh so irregular. So I decided to drink some Red Rasberry leaf tea.. with THREE tea bags. <——- Disclaimer: NEVER do this in active labor!

The contractions remained irregular until about 12 but were so very painful. I just was not ready and I believe the tea forced them but they were not productive as Ava was still not ready to come down.

I went from the bathtub to the floor to the bench back to the tub in efforts to ease the pain and nothing worked. I even begged McRush for an overdose of Tylenol. He said no.

I never called my doula because at this point it was just a waiting game and even now, in some of the worst pain I have ever been in, I was considering other people’s time.

At this point I just wanted to take a nap, I was exhausted. I laid down and there was no comfortable position so I got back up and roamed my room. Time was moving so slowly and McRush was as tired as I was because he’d been up longer and he was at my beck and call. His eyes were so red.

I decided to squat using our workout bench and see if gravity will let her ease on down. Boy did that work! I climbed in my bed and felt like reaching in and pulling her out with my bare hands, but that’s probably unsanitary, I thought.

I felt the need to push so Mcrush sat between my legs and waited.

He remembered that I had asked him a while back that when her head starts crowning to take his finger and go around the opening of my vagina and her head so I won’t tear. It seems to me that this was a gentle way of stretching me with her. At the time I did not remember asking him to do this and was about to kill him!

I would push and her head would ease out and then go back in. this happened about 3 or 4 times. By the 5th time, I was over it and pushed as hard as I can. Her head popped out and all I could think was, oh my God, the shoulders!!! I wanted to quit. It was in that moment I decided, again, no more children.

Her shoulders hurt like hell! McRush was clearing her airway and I just wanted to sleep.

I wanted to have a lotus birth but her placenta tore so we decided to bury it and plant a fruit tree.

So there it is, a recap (its much more fun when I tell it in person) of Lady Ava’s arrival into this realm. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.

OH! My doula came and took care of her. Changed her diaper, tied off her umbilical cord, and assessed her. she did a lot more but I don’t want to make this too long. I will blog a Doula appreciation blog soon. Her link, however, is aNaturalMindedMama BOOK HER! You will get much more than a birthing experience. She is so knowledgeable and patient.

iRush

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Let daddy do it.

Everyone knows I am the passive one who doesn’t mind the children running around, drawing on wall (with chalk) and not having a bed time. Even the children which is not necessarily a good thing.

Being so close to D day, my tolerance level is at about a -3. Today, for the first time in forever, McRush was off work and honey I took FULL advantage of it. I stayed locked in my room until two o clock. πŸ˜‡

There was structure and cleaning and cries of not-getting-my-way. And you know what? I had no compassion at all.

I recently had a moment of sadness and I told my sister who suggested a resolve I am not really feeling but honestly have been considering myself.

Sending them to school. PUBLIC school.

I literally struggle with this. I feel like I am failing my children by putting them into the school to prison cycle. But at the same time, I feel like I may be failing them by not giving them the best of me.

Today I realized after many years of marriage, that I really need to let Daddy handle more and stop running to their aid. Its not beneficial to them.or me. When dad chastise the children I always swoop in and be like “awe baby”. Nah, its time for some “awe me”. I’m over it.

Well, that was my moment. I hope you find comfort in knowing you are not alone when you struggle being mom. We all do.

iRush

Crunch time!

No. Not like sit up crunches. I would NEVER! 🀣

With just a few short days until my due date, although the likelihood that she will arrive on time is slim to none, I mean….. CPT and all, its time I get some things in order to lesson the additional stress of homeschooling, cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, bathing, running my business, all while adjusting to being a new mom again. So I am busy logging specific chores, meal plans, and creating planned content to post for my business. In addition, for the time being, maybe until spring the children will do packets.

I discussed how I do packets awhile back but for those who are new to following me, first if all HEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYY! πŸ‘‹πŸΎ, but I will give you the deets.

My most absolute favorite site to use for packets is www.tlsbooks.com (seriously, they should pay me as much as I promote them). This site has every subject your child needs and a while lot of extras too like foreign languages. This site only goes up to 6th grade though so outside of My son who has an IEP so he has two levels of each subject, its all I need. But I will drop additional links below.

Basically, I go to each grade and print out two sheets of each subject per day (ex. 2 math 2 science, 2 social studies, etc) and I staple them together and put their names on it or slide it in their folder. They know to do one packet a day.

When I do packets, its usually an easy teaching day for me so they will have time to do their packets and then usually a documentary for the week that they will watch and discuss or write a review, depending on their age, that will be due on that Friday. These are what I consider cheat days.

I have children who like to be self sufficient so the amount of work does not bother them. I will suggest that if your child is not so keen on working alone, give them one sheet per day with a different subject (ex. Math Monday, science Tuesday, etc) until both you and them are comfortable with an increase.

As far as the scheduling. I do the chore chart for one month at a time. Normally they have no specific chores so this DOES bother them. 🀷🏾 But it’s a rotating schedule that includes bathrooms, common area, kitchen, dining room, living room, den, laundry, halls, stairs, trash…. basically anything I don’t want to do. 😎

The food is a little more detailed because I schedule breakfast lunch and dinner for each day. I absolutely HATE doing this as I am more of a procrastinating chaos kind of worker so schedules give me hives but I will admit that with schedules home life is a lot more smooth sailing.

As far as the businesses, I download this app called Hootsuite and I schedule posts out for at least 6 weeks. So while it may seem as though I am on social media several times a day, do not feel dismayed if I don’t reply to something because its the app posting for me. It will post to my IG (www.instagram.com/JustAskMaia ) my facebook ( www.facebook.com/MaishaRush) and my Twitter ( www.twitter.com/Just_Ask_Maia ) How convenient!

These processes are what I hate most about having another child, too much organization! Lol.

Funny Fact- I am totally opposite when it comes to running my business. I’m like a beautiful Jekyll and Hyde. 😏

Welp, that’s it for the check in! Check out some other school packet resources! ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓

www.worksheetFun.com

www.homeschoolmath.net

www.AfricanAmericanHomeschoolMoms.com

iRush

Out of towners

What holiday does your family celebrate?

For us, Christmas is just another day much like most other holidays. We have transitioned a lot over the years, I imagine that bothers some people close to us but no doubt it really doesn’t effect us.

This year, however, we decided to surprise my father with a visit. We packed the children up and hit the road.

I95 bound at 430 in the morning I already regretted the trip. It was long and about midway through I had to convince myself that seeing my siblings trumped the restlessness and irritability of a very enclosed RushBunch.

Whew Chile!

The plan was for the siblings to meet up and meet at my dad’s house, but much like the rest of 2018 things did not go as planned. Nevertheless the smile on my fathers face was absolutely priceless. All of us together for the first time, ever, was a moment I was so happy to be able to share in.

We don’t do presents and we don’t cook big dinners because we learned a long time ago that the memories last so much longer and feel so much better.

πŸ₯‚To 2019πŸ₯‚

iRush

*I had to add another picture of me and my brother because he is always on his lonely vibe but he loves me* 😘

Why y’all Let me stray!

I have been back on my business grind. I will tell you that it is not easy juggling a whole family and business. I don’t know why I torment myself this way. I oftentimes equate it to my Philadelphia roots. In the city its always GO GO GO. But here in the south everyone is so laid back and that gets contagious so I find myself getting comfortable and slacking.

I have to find a better balance.

This month is Math month with homeschooling. We have one week to perfect a certain subject in math. Our first week, was time. While schools have chosen to take out the teaching if analogue clocks, I choose the medieval ways. Lol. What good is it to take away such necessary knowledge? I will touch on that at some other time.

This week of time has been more time consuming than I’d anticipated. But alas, we made it through and my children are 1 step smarter… *does mommy happy dance*

This week coming is money. As you know I have several levels of children so while some will be learning what each tender is, some will be learning the value of it, some will be learning how to properly assess and apply it, and some will be learning how to manage it. -This ought to be fun 😐

As far as business, I decided to add a group, or ‘Village’ rate to my consulting services where we help a group of up to 5 friends build their businesses for essentially half price of a regular consultation. (Feel free to pass that on. πŸ˜‰).

http://www.RushConsultingFirm.com ←plug

In addition, we are working on putting together a homeschool planner and sample curriculum, hopefully to be ready by the 2019-2020 year. 🀞🏾

We are still learning ASL and 2 of the RushBunch are learning French in addition. Since we freeschool, its really on the fly and no set agenda but I am happy to say they are learning very well. I’m feeling pretty confident in our homeschooling.

I don’t mean to go on these hiatus, life just moves so fast sometimes, blogging slips my mind. So in the future (I know some of you do already) feel free to shoot me a message and remind me.

Oh, Did I tell you guys I went to jail? I’ll tell you about it next time! 😐

-Rush

Does your child REALLY have ADHD?

Many of you know my story of why I started homeschooling but in case you don’t, Here is how it all started.

#2 is a phenomenally brilliant child. Everything about him was on time starting at birth. He hit all of his “marks” as expected or sooner. Crawling, walking, speaking, etc. He was always inquisitive but not busy. Fast forward to second grade where, and I mean no offense as I was just as naive then, he had a teacher who could not “handle” him. Those were her words. Thinking back, I should have responded “my son doesn’t need a handler he needs an educator”. But, of course, hindsight is 2020.

At the advice of the school we took him to get evaluated by a physician (second mistake). Of course they opted for him to go on medication. I cried for about a week because everything in me was against this. But what else could I do?

I held out as long as I could lying to administrators that he was getting his medication and maybe it just hadn’t kicked in yet. After about two weeks we were told that something needed to be done or he would be expelled for “not cooperating”. Needless to say, I began giving him the meds. I would periodically take him off and like clockwork would get a note asking if he was still taking them.

These pills zoned my baby out to the point that I did not know who he was. He always had a blank stare and that creative, inquisitive, bright young boy began to fade away.

I would request lower dosages or different types of medication but they all had him like a zombie.

Fast forward to the fourth grade. I had done hours of research and diet changes and decided that this was not what I wanted long term for my son. I went to the school and demanded more focus on my son instead of shuffling him through the rat hole called public education. They offered an IEP and put him on a second grade level without his medication.

Dissatisfied, I pulled him from school. Much like my decision to quit my job and start my own business, I had no idea what I was doing or what I was going to do but I knew a change had to be made.

While he is doing much better without medications, it definitely took a toll on him. He now needs speech therapy and has memory loss as side affects of the meds. I have learned to adjust his learning to better suit his academic needs. That’s all I ever wanted from his teachers.

My son never had ADHD. He had a case of being a child that teachers didn’t want to tolerate. He had questions they either didn’t want to or couldn’t answer. He didn’t learn at the same pace as others. He wanted to get out of the chair for more than 30 minutes of a 7 hour day. He wanted a challenge.

At the time I had 5 children in school. I pulled them ALL. Go big or go home right?

-Rush

Unschool, reschool, deschool, homeschool?

There are so many adjectives to choose from and I have tried them all. There are so many structures to apply, or not apply, to learn the best way that your child learns. Being a mother of 10 can be additionally exhaustive because no two children learn alike.

While this may seem like a lot to mentally process, I assure you it is time that will help you most.

Homeschooling is based on the idea that children can learn at their pace instead of being pressured to move according to their classmates. One child will always progress faster than the other. My two six year olds for instance (no not twins). My boy, surprisingly, learned quicker than my girl. He picked things up, excelled, and retained at a more progressive rate than she did although she was not lacking or failing by any means. Some children just develop a love of learning and some do it because they know they need to but its not as interesting as playing. And that’s okay. That is the joy of homeschooling, they can break when they want (when you approve). It can be used as a reward or even just part of curriculum.

After watching Akeelah and the bee, there was a scene where she jumped rope to keep the spelling of a word. They loved this and we used this method to learn syllables. We used hopscotch for math, etc.

Child led learning has absolutely been the best method for us. I kind of give the children a break from learning for a week, outside of unschooling which is trickery that they are unaware of πŸ˜‚. Then, I let them come to me with what they want to do. Right now we are doing ASL and because this is something they chose, they have picked up over 100 words and phrases in a week! How phenomenal. This is something I know traditional school would not have been able to accomplish with the RushBunch. Even our 1 year old can gesture a few meanings. In addition we are learning about WW1 and WW2, French, and letter writing using applied English composition. Again, these are subjects they chose which means they are more likely to retain the knowledge they acquired.

I am excited for their journey and honored to be such an instrumental part of it.

What is your family doing?

iRush

New toys for big boys.

So something I don’t talk much about…

McRush.

I think I may have hurt his feelings the other day when I said “I am tired of feeling like a single parent”.

The truth is sometimes I do. And that’s not to negate ANYTHING he does because he is a great father, husband, and phenomenal provider. As a homeschooling parent to the RushBunch who is home all the time (outside of attending conferences and meetings for my business). It can get exhausting as rewarding as It is in the long run, I would be a liar to have you believe otherwise.

I oftentimes tease that he “gets to leave the house” and of course his response is, ” I don’t GET to, I have to.” We laugh but he may feel slighted sometimes which is absolutely not my goal.

I have a great thing. I know I do. I love him to pieces and appreciate him more than I could ever say or show.

He makes it possible to stay at home with our babies. And being married previously as well as being in relationships prior; I know THAT’S a big deal.

We recently hit a rough financial patch and McRush is picking up every available hour known to man but I miss him being around more. (The extra money is NICE THOUGH!)

I gotta make it up to him so I guess I’ll be doing some Jill Scott and grapefruit soon… OW OW!😜 Be on the lookout for #12 πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Who thought of this!

I am pretty flexible in my homeschooling agenda, I am sure you all know that. But in this, my third trimester of Rush number 11, I find that I have limited amounts of wanting to adult, or mommy, or well, anything that involves me getting out of the bed. But oh have I finally mastered a method that not only I love but my children do as well.

All of these resources, literally hundreds, that I have meticulously collected and taken the time to organized and strategize. The implementations and tedious goals; Worthless for the rest of the year because this, this I love!

What is it you say? Well, I’m glad you asked.

Unschooling.

Now I know I have already spoke about utilizing this method some days but now, NOW I feel like I was doing it all wrong because honey my children are taking flight in this learning thing. My children are well above their traditional grade levels and they loving every moment of it.

It is so simple and the children easily grasp it. Not only that, they look forward to it and so do I. The time goes by so fast when using this method because we all enjoy it.

Y’all! Mind BLOWN! πŸ’₯

iRush

It’s the time.

This morning was spent with my girls. We sat on my bed eating Doritos, drinking Cheerwine soda and watching Maid In Manhattan. Our hairs were in a beatiful morning disarray as we were all in our pajamas; they climbed up on me getting comfortable and it was quiet. It was peaceful. It was love. I looked down at my babies and I just smiled.
We push so hard to give our children all the things that we never had, to live a life we never did. We strive to be the best providers we can be. Tilling the grounds and pulling the weeds making sure no rock of prosperity is left unturned. We work day and night losing sleep and not taking care of our bodies for the betterment of our families. We lose ourselves in the translation of happiness. We find ourselves pitifully unhappy with failure and it eats at us yet it feeds on us. It sits and festures until it reaches the pit of our souls and sours us to the bones.
We have to take a moment and look. Look around. Look at your babies. Look at your life.
Do I want the best for my family? Absolutely. Financial prosperity and stability is essential but it is not primary. We had something that was more important than money. We had time.
In all your getting, don’t forget to spend time with family. Its priceless and its irreplaceable.

i

Rush

(This blog is old to me but new to you)