How I juggle my family and businesses

Peace and love beloveds.

Things are starting to pick up quite quickly and trust me, I have no complaints. Some mornings I wake up not knowing exactly what to start on but magical me always manages to get it completed thus going to bed, however early morning it is, feeling satisfied with my accomplishments. I am hoping to be able to hire 1 person per business venture soon, that is, afterall, the goal of being an entrepreneur; graduating to a small business with  employees. I strive to start businesses because I feel everyone has an idea worth capitalizing on, whether it is full time or passive, but I am also aware that not everyone has the desire to be a small business owner and I await the opportunity to offer the flexibility that comes with working for a small business like mine, or yours.

The Heels&Hustle Meet and Greet is in a couple days and I could not be more excited. I am hoping to make awesome connections with some beautifully minded entrepreneurs. I am eager to talk marketing and promoting as well as ideas with people who desire more out of life.

Anyhow.

I saw someone post on Facebook that they were going to sell their children in the marketplace. I  must say that I am strongly considering it, I’d probably post them on Amazon because I don’t want to negotiate. Its $1 FIRM, plus but one get 8 free. This of course is a joke and I have no desire to part from my babies!. I love them so much no matter how much they drive me looney. By the end of any given day we are usually a bunch of over exerted coo coos with the giggles. #RushBunch

You know, I really cannot tell you HOW, exactly, I juggle my family and the iRush Brand because a schedule is NOT it. I have no idea what orders are coming in until they come in. I can plan to work on something but more than likely it will get bumped by something or someone else. The truth is, I’d probably get bored if I maintained a set schedule for work. The children are basically on a set schedule although they veer from time to time. But I have always been something like a nomad, my father calls me a gypsy. I am not the typical person who needs the stable life to feel accomplished, let me be free and then I will feel accomplished. Since my husband is almost the complete opposite and felt it is his duty, rightfully so, to offer this very thing I hate for me and the children, we bought a home. Bah Humbug! I pouted the entire time. I must say that it does feel good not to be renting buuuut, I’m still resistant.

Now, back to the subject matter, How I juggle the RushBunch and my businesses; Consistency. No matter how much I have to do, I found that I may not get everything done but I never stop chipping away, even on the weekends when I proclaim to be off. It is actually when I get the most brainstorming and work done. I still answer emails and messages. I still do things that do not require direct contact with people unless its setting up conferences or meetings for the upcoming week. In addition, though I do not get much sleep, I do get plenty of time with my babies. There is a bowling alley that has absolutely no service, I found it frustrating initially but I heard the signs loud and clear, it is for family time and so this is the perfect place to go because it forces me NOT to work.

Well enough of my ramblings for the night.

Be easy Kings and Queens.

-Rush

What a frustrating productive day.

Its just been one of those days where I was either fussing or in my zone, there was no in between.

It seems as if the RushBunch know just when I am on a time crunch and seriously trying to meet deadlines. Unfortunately for them, their deterrent serum did not work on me today. I was able to fuss and do a complete 180 and get many things accomplished.

Its Friday so that meant McRush was home but no where to be found. Well, I knew where he was but he was in do not disturb mode aka sleeping. I hate Fridays with a passion. McRush works weekends, ALL  weekend so he sleeps in the day and heads to work Friday evening. I have to give it to him, he hangs with me as long as he can before nodding off or I have to send him to bed before he suffers fatigue, but when he goes to sleep, These littles know just what to do to drive me crazy. I oftentimes feel like a single parent on the weekend but I get through it.

Regardless of their many interruptions, I was able to complete my Speaker Sheet (which is long overdue), create a new terms of agreement contract and confidentiality agreement for my clients, completed client’s certification, two invoices, a website, and two consults. That is in addition to cooking breakfast, lunch, and dinner and taking an hour to teach the ingrates…. I mean RushBunch.

I will never be one to tell you that being anything is easy especially a mom, wife, and entrepreneur but at the end of the day it will always be worth it.

We have to remember that in our fight to be great mothers and great wives we must also take the initiative to be a great US. For me that is spending time to focus on my business because I love to help people, it makes me feel good to know I helped someone reached a goal. Whatever makes you feel good, do that and do it often. And if anyone questions you about it, tell them to come and talk to me so I can tell them to be a great support so you can do what you want!

-Rush

To beat their butts or not…..

I’m not here for a debate so I will just jump right into it.

As a mother to 9, soon to be 10, children, I assure you that this is the most asked questioned we get. It is usually dressed up nicely by those who try to be politically correct or just plain nosey. “How do you get them to behave?’ or “What do you use?”

The answer in my head is, none of your dang business, but I play nice and smile and say “Love.”

Believe it or not children do respond well to it. Now, please do not be misinformed, they CAN get it but it doesn’t resort to that.

I have my days when I want to pull my hair out or simply state to my husband, ..”and we have NINE”. I get headaches and I fuss. Most times I put myself in time out which is usually the attempt to hide in my closet from the littles who have not yet learned my moods and patience level.

Every time, and I do mean every time, we are out in public we are approached with statements like, “I can’t even get my two children to behave, I cannot imagine having nine”. The truth is, if you cannot get your two children to behave then you probably should have stopped at one. I know, that was harsh but you are the parent.

As for me I am the most impatient person I know and I do not accept anything less than your best and that goes for my children as well. If they are wrong, I tell them they are wrong. If they are not doing their best, I tell them that too. If they are acting like a jerk, I let them know that as well. I am really bad at sugar coating things and that goes for my children as well. I pretty much treat my children like I treat my clients. I am not here to feed you fairytales about how wonderful you are and how great the world is. I am here to tell you the truth and prepare you for an even harsher truth called life.

So I suppose by now you are like, answer the question already! So, No. No I do not beat my children into submission otherwise my life would be much simpler. My children are very well behaved in public but let me tell you something, they are absolutely barbaric at home! I mean really, flipping through the house, jumping down the stairs, running around like loose weirdos, but in public, not a peep.

There really is no secret to it at all. Do I believe children should get their butt beat? Yup. I have seen some children that I just want to beat on site, old school with an extention cord but they are not mine so I digress and mind my business like I would like people to do about mine.

Again, I definitely have my days, especially trying to work on my businesses and homeschool whilst continuing to be a good wife and mother. It is tiring and oftentimes stressful. I recently spoke with someone about this issue I have about feeling like I was going to go crazy and she suggested I, get this, get organized!!! What, the nerve! But I took her advice and spent the last week in June creating a slew of schedules that I implemented starting July 1st. And although it is only the second of July, my life has never been so smooth sailing, even before the RushBunch. We stick to those schedules like my life depends on it (because I think it does). This is the second night where nine o’clock hit and all of my children are asleep. This feels like heaven! If I keep this up, this may not be the last Rush out of me yet [LIES].

I am so grateful for her and her wise words to me. Now I am like a child in a candy store; excited to get to bed before one a.m.

Lets talk statistics.

Now let me first say, I must be out of my mind to talk statistics in  my blog because I don’t have many readers as is so to add a mathematical conversation is almost insane. I’m about to lose the two followers I DO have.

But hear me out, at least halfway through, I think this is important.

Many of you know about my Consulting Firm. I have been revamping and perfecting over the last few weeks and I tend to come across some very important information from time to time and I like to share. As my children say in their failed attempts to guilt me into rationing off my food, “Sharing is caring” <– thanks Barney!

As a person of color, I am all too aware of the negative statistics constantly shoved in my face in attempts to make me believe many things but among them, that we, Reflections, tend to be lazy. Now, if for no other reason than the simple fact that I nor my husband are this way, I have always refused to believe that. Please do not misinterpret that to say that none of us are because I have definitely run across my share in my past life, my past life being naive and young. But the general population of Reflections are far from lazy. I could get off track and mention that no one ever felt like we were lazy when we were ‘building this joint for free’, in the words of Angela Ray. But I will stay the course and continue with my knowledgeable rant of improper and misused statistics.

Did you know that there were over 2.5 BILLION businesses owned by Reflections? Bet you didn’t. Did you know that we owned more businesses than Asians? Yup, MORE, despite the fact that you can find a restaurant or nail salon on just about any corner in poverty stricken neighborhoods?

Forbes just did an article on the top 10 black billionaires….. the top TEN which means there are more than 10, and guess what, your commonly known hip hopper, rapper, and television personalities did not make the list, nor did your Athletic heroes.

It used to be stated that if you don’t want a black man [or woman] to know something, put it in a book. But with so many people reading more, now its just, ‘don’t let them see it’. You lose hope when you continue pushing and don’t see a prosperous end or you don’t see anyone you know, directly or indirectly, making it quite like you believe you should. We cannot let this hinder us from pressing on.

I push my business so much and I do not see much, if any, growth but I do not let that deter me. I know I offer a great service backed by an amazing brand, and on those days that I have no clients to work for, I work on my own business as if I am a client (unless its doing my business plan because THAT thing is not happening). But you have to remember, every business that has succeeded, has done so because they caught someones eye. How can you catch someones eye if you quit. You can’t quit. The only person who loses most when you quit is you, aren’t you tired of feeling like you are always losing? When you start a business the only way you will ever lose is if you quit, so don’t quit and if you want to quit, call me, I’ll give you reasons why you shouldn’t quit. I guarantee it.

-Rush

My WHY.

People that start their own businesses are often encouraged to find out and expand on their ‘why’. Why do you want to do this thing that you are doing? Why do you continue putting forth so much effort when sometimes it seems pointless?

Your ‘why’ is meant to be a foundation of what will keep you going on the days you are tired and want to quit. Most times people will say that their why is their children or their parents. Sometimes its for their spouses or simply because they no longer want to be where they are now in their current situation which could be anything from homeless or brokenness.

I can make pages of a list of what keeps me going, I won’t,  but I can. I have a large family whom I love so very dearly. I have a husband that inspires me to keep going or quit because he has my back regardless. But for me, my why is so simple. It wasn’t always simple as I would rack my brain over whats more important to me to place on my ‘why’ list and as I push forward my list is actually quite short. Really, beyond short because it consists of only one reason. Because I want to.

Oftentimes we struggle and get so lost in life and devote ourselves to so many causes and people that we lose ourselves. I gave up plenty of things to be an awesome wife and mother,  yeah I said it, AWESOME! But in our giving, as women we have to remember that we are just as important and the important people in our lives. 

This is not something you always know, this is definitely a learned mindset but now that I have learned it, I am happily passing it on. So the next time someone asks you what is your ‘why’, simply hold your head up high and with pride say, because I want to. 

-Rush

I cried last night.

I recently shared a post on Facebook saying I felt like I needed to cry but nothing was wrong. I got a lot of sisterly advice to allow the release to flow. I didn’t.  Truth is, I hate crying. It makes me feel weak and helpless, furthermore tears never resolve problems in my humble opinion. I moved past it. This was about three days ago.

Well, last night I went in my bathroom while McRush slept and I sobbed. It was quiet because I know he would have come in. At first I didn’t know what I was crying about but as I allowed the tears to fall all of this anxiety and anger and frustration came pouring to the surface revealing the true heaviness of my heart. 

I cried because my business is stressful running it by myself but not financially secure enough for me to hire someone. I cried because I am overweight and cannot seem to get it under control. I cried because my children drive me crazy some days. I cried because my relationships are strained (not with McRush). I cried because I don’t get enough rest.I cried because so many people are losing their lives. I cried because, well because I just do not know what else to do.

The release was not as fullfilling as I thought it would be, it never is that’s why I don’t do it, but it did bring up some suppressions that I obviously need to take care of to be a better more happy me. Do I recommend it? Not if you’re like me and need to find wholeness in everything you do because crying isn’t it. But, if you need to find the source of your sadness, sure. For me, it just gave me a list of things that I need to add to my to do list. Thanks, me, for being a crybaby.

-Rush 

Caught in the middle.

There is a man that I look up to very much, yes someone outside of McRush. He is a very wise man and a very prosperous business owner, which is why I look up to him and have been even before Rush Consulting Firm was thought of. He keeps me on my toes with his creative ideas and desire to continue to move forward. He gave me some advice awhile back and I was hesitant yet equally as eager to take it. For those who know me or my Facebook page, I am very vocal when it comes to Reflections, whether it be for self accountability (which I blogged about and if you didn’t read it, you should) or for the injustices and/inequalities of Reflections. I am very unapologetic and dedicated to moving forward in what some would call the revolution, but I call Stand up.

This amazing man told me that I should clear my Facebook of things on my personal page that would be deemed as biased which in turn would potentially turn away clientele. I thought that he had a point and so I tediously went through my Facebook page and deleted all of my ‘controversial’ posts. I was compliant and I did not feel as sad about it as I would have thought. HOWEVER, moving forward as well as thinking back, I should have left it although I still agree that in general it was a very wise decision, just not for me.

Let’s think back first. Rush Consulting Firm, rather the intent for Rush Consulting Firm, was for the empowerment and building along with self sufficiency FOR Reflections not the general population. Yet going along with the general conception, I was quickly seen as an asset to ‘other’ communities rather than that of Reflections. Business is business and I rarely turn it down so I found myself oftentimes promoting to all as opposed to some which is where fine tuning my very public Facebook comes in.

Now let’s look at moving forward. The goal for Rush Consulting Firm still remains, in my heart, one of the biggest assets to Reflection’s community. Although it’s like pulling teeth, I will not lie, to get Reflections to support, I still have much confidence in my vision for my company. It is a matter of showing that Rush Consulting Firm is indeed an asset.

As I look through my Facebook feed, It really breaks my heart all of the stories I hear about police brutality towards Reflections. As a mother and wife I cannot take the pain of so many people lost at the hands of police. I want to yell and scream and cry and fight.  Therefore I find myself here, knowing the advice is very good advice but do I post about it?

Let me say that I know posting means NOTHING! Nothing! You can post and cry, you can post and march but change will not come until we stand. I am so tired. Everyone is waiting for a leader, someone to follow, but that is what is wrong with the community of Reflections, we are not taught to lead ourselves. We are so busy fighting among one another; who is more black, is Jesus real, black on black crime vs police on black crime. We are literally fighting the injustices of our people, the injustices for our people, AND our own people. When will enough be enough? What is wrong with us?

I know the revolution isn’t for everyone, but are we really this naive as a people? I do not know about you but I will NOT die with my hands up and I will NOT die on my knees.

All power to the people.

-Rush

Oh Em Geee!

Friday night I was granted every mother’s wish. It was totally unexpected and really caught me off guard, so much so I was initially resistant. #7 was invited to a birthday party on Saturday and since her cousin was going, my sister offered for her to stay the night to ride with them. I was hesitant initially because I just don’t let my babies stay the night out, if you don’t know why, you haven’t been following me long. Anyhow, I went to drop her off and, GET THIS, my sister wanted them all!!!! Yes, all nine of my babies. Now while I feel better sending all nine than just one, I was still very reluctant but it is my sister and I trust her mounds. So McRush and I had the night and the house to ourselves.

It was a very weird feeling as we thought back and realized we have never been without all of our children at once EVER! How exciting right? Wrong, I worried the entire night. I talked about how much I missed them and I wanted to change mind and go get them but We enjoyed a nice quiet dinner together without interruption. When we went to bed, I could swear I heard one of the babies crying. I was miserable. I was excited to pick up my RushBunch early Saturday morning I was almost giddy…ALMOST. I picked up my eight but was saddened to leave my girl.

Well It’s Sunday and all of my babies are home AND I WISH THEY WOULD GO AWAY!!!!!

Ugh! What was I thinking not taking advantage of the peace and quiet I have always longed for, well maybe not always but surely consistently in the past 6 years.

Stupid bipolar mommy moments!

On another note, I’d hired someone to do my laundry. I guess she changed her mind because I never heard back from her. Smh

-Rush

Virtuous? Hmmmm

The bible states that we must be virtuous and knowledge is the most important application in being virtuous. Now, I am not one to go against the word of God but there are levels to virtue. And while having knowledge is top of the list when having a close and intimate relationship with God I am here to tell you that when it come to being a virtuous mother and wife, honey patience is what you need. Sometimes I have to take a deep breath and remind myself of this. I take so many deep breaths in a day I am surprise I don’t hyperventilate.  Whoosa! The biggest thing when being a wife is knowing that is not always important to have the last word and saying less is more. That’s my constant hurdle. I have always been one to have to have the last word. And as vain or cocky as this may sound, I am rarely wrong but that’s only because I speak what I know or firmly believe not just guessing without having any knowledge of the subject. But my husband is not much different than many other husbands, they have to be correct. No real reason just something in that testosterone that says you must be right at all times or else. You can’t really fault him for it though, I believe all men are born with a caveman mentality.  Lol.

As far as being a mother, patience is extremely detrimental to your happiness and well being. There is this ultra fine line of discipline and allowing your child to express themselves and THAT takes patience…and knowledge. We have to remind ourselves that they are adults in training. However we cannot overlook the fact that these young adults need discipline and structure while expressing themselves. Also remember that they will mock what they see as well.

Tonight we were driving home and I was working on a project unintentionally. ……okay maybe it was a little intentional. .. alright…..

Tonight we were driving home and I was working on a project while ignoring the children calling my name. It was driving me absolutely crazy by the way but what I was working on I could not allow a break in the flow or all would be lost. A few minutes later Ty called Bella. He called her about nine times. I turned around (taking that break I didn’t want to take) and asked Bella if she heard her brother calling her, she said yes. I asked her why and she had no answer. I know that she was only doing it because I just did it to her. I could be mad and tell her like my mother told me, “do as I say not as I do” but that’s just stupid because children emulate us that’s how they grow and learn but that takes patience. Without patience you are unable to know when to act (teach) or react (discipline).

I by no means know it all but I hope you will continue to follow me and my family as I continue to strive to be a virtuous woman for my family.

-Rush

 

Just a regular mom.

HA! Sike! I’m no regular mom! I’m supermom!!!! Then I slap the alarm and literally roll out of bed. Onto the floor is where I start my meditation. Ohmmmmmm. I am sure to feel the vibations through my body as I repeat in my head, today will be a peaceful day.

10 minutes later I am yelling at my bunch to get out of my room so I can shower in peace. It never works by the way, upon exiting the shower my room is still filed with an audience.

I go over the same rules of the morning which are never obliged; clean your room, brush your teeth and put on some clothes. In my attempts to escape to the kitchen there is a trail of two or three littles who are obviously, in their minds, immune to the aforementioned rule.Struggling to make breakfast and be the watchman for everything not kid friendly, which is everything a child shouldn’t be touching, I have officially started my day.

Some days, if I am wise, I have planned out the school work ahead of time and I can focus on getting some Rush Consulting Firm work done. Otherwise I spend the entire duration of their workday fussing and reiterating because my children like to drive me crazy. My breaks during the day are usually because I need to make breakfast lunch or dinner. always running always moving. Most days I forget that I am pregnant. By the end of the day I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

I am exhausted but I wouldn’t change it for the world, well maybe a cup of coffee. But I stopped drinking coffee, and drinking and smoking, and cursing… GOD! What was I thinking!!!

-Rush