Where do babies come from?

Sooo, after having a house full of children, one of the RushBunch decided to ask me the question no parent likes to be asked. Where do babies come from? Actually, I would not have minded that question because the way the question is posed it would be an easily divertable one. But alas, the geniuses that learn at Rush Academy know me all too well. Her direct question was, How do babies get in your stomach?

For those that do not read my blogs or posts often, first of all, shame on you, you must know that I have a very direct and honest approach with my children. There is no fairy tales and fallacies I use to cover up truths and fact of life. No flying storks over here!

Despite what some may think, babies do not come from McRushes mangina. Only a man and woman can make that happen.

While this question makes me sad that my baby is growing up, my first instinct was, how can I make this a homeschool lesson. But before the lesson, I must first answer the question because it will only be repeated until I do.

What did I say? Sperm. Yes, I gave a one-word answer and looked at her for the follow-up, there wasn’t one. Assuredly she was waiting for my explanation but I had already decided that it will be a school lesson. The little that asked me is seven and I figure, my six and five years old would be interested as well. So, tomorrows lesson will be on sex education. We have a 16-year-old whom we have a talk with probably every year since he was 9 but bring it up more often, as we giggle about how uncomfortable he gets because we are so blunt. He appreciates it though he says, keeps him in check.

I was hoping to continue with finances but that can wait until next week.

-Rush

baby girls

 

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Why this is my last Pregnancy.

Some people always dreamed of having a large family. Some people do not want children at all. Me and McRush, we never really opted either way. We were a happily married couple who really just went with the flow of things. Although, there were times where we tried several different birth control options; we got pregnant on every one. NuvaRing(2), IUD (2), the patch (2), the pill, etc. It just seemed like the Gods were laughing at our every attempt to not conceive. So we quit trying. Many people have asked why I don’t get a tubal ligation or McRush a vasectomy, which is rude to say the least but… We have never been a fan of permanently altering our bodies, what will be will be. The only thing that has ever worked for us is going strictly off my cycle and the moon cycle (yes it works) HOWEVER, this particular method takes discipline to resist urges, discipline, clearly, we do not always have. So here we are sitting in the hospital after having to go an emergency cesarean with pregnancy number 10.

This experience has prompted me to rethink methods of birth control. Still absolutely not a fan of body alterations and obviously being two very fertile beings meant to single-handedly replenish the earth of melanated children (that is a joke), the aforementioned medical procedures are starting to look like our only options.

Having suffered losing a child to SIDS (that is a story for another day) and miscarrying another, the loss is not something I want to continue with, especially something as precious as a child.

Here is the rundown of my latest pregnancy hiccup.

I went to a scheduled doctors appointment to get checked. I was 39 weeks and 5 days along, and as any mom could tell you, this is one of those uncomfortable visits where a doctor has to place her fingers inside of you and see if you are dilated. I was two centimeters but for me, that is nothing because I can hold that position for a month. So, we checked out and went about our day. While at Walmart, I stopped to go to the restroom and as I squatted over the toilet, yes, I squat, I saw what looked like mustard but much more brown. I called McRush into the restroom and explained and showed him, yeah, we are THAT couple. I called the office a spoke to a nurse who told me not to worry but just be watchful. Leary, we continued on with our errands. About an hour later, the nurse calls back and said the doctor wants me to go in. We head to the hospital arriving just before six in the evening and they hook me up to the monitors. Turns out what I thought were Braxton hicks all this time were actually contractions and with every contraction #10 heartbeat would take a nose dive. We had an awesome nurse, actually two, one was Maria P. and the other I do not remember but when I find out I will update this post. These ladies were not having it. after 4 contraction/rate drops, they wanted to get him out. They moved very quickly to make it happen. By 6:32 #10 was welcomed into the world, not by me though because I was KNOCKED out.  In addition to being under anesthesia, I’d had an allergic reaction so was dosed with Benadryl.

I didn’t know where my baby was or whether or not he was alive. No one was saying anything and I was too drugged up to ask.

At four thirty in the morning, I was rolled down to the NICU where #10 was being held filled with tubes and laid out almost completely naked. This was the first time I had seen him and I couldn’t even hold him. It broke my heart into pieces and I knew then that I would not be going through this again.

He is having respiratory issues because of the meconium he ingested. That is what I was leaking in Walmart because I had ruptured and didn’t even know it.

He is doing better. He is off oxygen and off of his feeding tube. I may still have to be discharged without him but I have a few people out there cashing in favors through prayer so I am hopeful that at the very max, I can pick him up one day after I am released.

I have had a c-section before, but it was because #5 pushed his cord out with his hand so the aftermath was I still was able to hold him and leave with him. As a homeschooling mom whom already has detachment issues because of the loss of two of my aforementioned children, leaving my side is not something I am comfortable with when it comes to my babies. So this is hard for me. I have been keeping busy with work while in the hospital despite the pleas from friends, loved ones, and strangers alike, to take it easy.

I appreciate all of the love and well wishes from everyone and I will keep you posted.

-Rush

 

Words mean something.

Sitting here having a conversation with McRush about words and the root of them.

I posted a while back on Facebook that I do not teach my children to say I am sorry, I apologize, or any variation thereof. Some people feel like I am cold for having this approach, you know because people are oftentimes so quick to judge. I will admit that for the most part I can seem a little distant and skeptical until you get to know me. This stems mostly from a history of being hurt and betrayed, lied to and led on. I am very forgiving though because, I believe, you either genuinely do not know any better or I just took too long to know the real you. I have learned that I cannot concern myself with your ignorance (for not knowing better) or callousness (for not caring about me the way I did you).

While I am easily a crybaby, usually from holding things in, I am not a very emotional person. I am, however an open book. I hide nothing and that includes my discontent.

The purpose behind me not allowing my children to say I am sorry is actually two fold. First, they are my children and they are far from ‘sorry’. They are smart, outstanding, and humble little people who are finding their purpose in life, there is nothing to be sorry about. Second, by stating you are sorry, you are implying you regret what has happened when in all actuality, you shouldn’t regret anything that happens in your life.

Things happen TO you or FOR you. Either way it is a lesson learned, and without learning a lesson, you will continually repeat the same “mistake” in life until you do.

If #7 is running and swinging his arms and as he runs past #8 hits him, naturally he would look back and say “I’m sorry” but keep going. But at a better glance, he isn’t ‘sorry’ because he kept running. Stating that you regret something happen is stating that you wish in never happened AND will take precautionary measures to assure it does not happen again.

What makes your words mean something are the actions in which follow your statement. For this reason I teach my children the root of the word and SHOWING their concern rather than their regret.

In the aforementioned incident, what #7 should do is stop, turn around and check on #8 as well as seeing if there is anything he can do to make the situation better.

Words mean nothing if your actions do not support it. Learning the root of words will keep you from saying things that you really don’t mean as well as forcing you to take the time to analyze your actions and learn from them.

I do not believe you should regret anything in life. Regret serves no purpose except to weigh you down with guilt and possibly shame. I do not have time for either. This oftentimes can be misconstrued as heartless and unkind but cannot be further from the truth. I, in fact, am very kind and full of giving. Anyone who knows me can vouch for me. I just have no time for foolishness and antics when it comes to living my life. If you have ever seen the show Bones, I am Bones.

-Rush


 

It’s deeper than that.

Greetings!

Thank you for checking in. I would like to focus on something I normally do not speak upon; Money.

It is often assumed that we reap the many ‘benefits’ of public assistance because our family is so big, but lets be quite honest, its more so because we are black than any other reason. That’s a conversation for another day though.

You would be surprised at just how many times my family has been denied medicaid, food stamps, cash assistance, or even financial help from programs like LIHEAP; liquid assets I suppose because our pockets were definitely a liability when we found ourselves in a position to seek out such help. What I did learn though, is we are better off without it? Why? Accountability. I may make a few enemies with this but it is one of  my most favorite sayings. It is from Mr. Bill Cosby when once speaking for the Rainbow Coalition a few years back. He stated that we rely too much on the welfare system and by welfare he was speaking in its entirety including public housing. He said “The system is not set to sustain you but for you to move in, move up, and move out.” [I paraphrase.] We all have moments in life where we need help but taking advantage of this ‘help’ is not only irresponsible, it’s  selfish. What about the people who really need it, even more than you but you are celebrating the fact that you pay $7 in rent while raking in hundreds of dollars in food stamps and cash assistance while simultaneously keeping yourself and children geared up in the latest fashions? You could, no you should be saving that money to buy a home, cash even, with all the money you save. Start a business. Something besides attaching value to such materialistic things that completely depletes in value the moment you purchase it.

This is not a post to belittle or offend anyone because I and my family were down and out a few times before arriving where we are, both mentally and financially. It is a post to make you consider your intentions.

My business Rush Consulting Firm, is set to show you how to build a business on a solid foundation without breaking the bank and maintain your business by maximizing your dollar. I have a Business mindset series that will start January 10, 2018 last through June 2018 and its FREE. It will be streamed via Periscope. While the information I will be giving out is awesome for starting and growing your business mindset, I think That I will add some streams that speak on financial literacy. Now I am no financial adviser so I will not be going into depth due to liability, but I can definitely share some tips I have learned that helped me along the way.

There is a growing concern over our debt in America and if you live here, you should be concerned about it too. Our biggest reasons for financial deficit? Yup, public assistance i.e. Medicaid and Medicare, two of the biggest things we rely on. But we can start our businesses and help the economic structure or wait, getting everything we can until its dried out, and later suffer the consequences.

I also get from people, that I have secured my retirement plan with my children, my first thought is how grossly ignorant such a comment is. The truth is, I am securing theirs and McRush and I’s by teaching them financial literacy in addition to becoming an entrepreneur and business owner. This is also one of the reasons I chose to home school our children, these very basic fundamentals of life are not taught in school. This along with self respect, humanity, and confidence are the things that will pull the economy together but, in my humble opinion, that is not the goal of the government but I will stop there before I find myself in trouble.

I do hope you will join me in the Business Mindset Series via Periscope starting in January so you can take a hold of your financial stability starting with the mind set. If you do not have Periscope, get one, of course its FREE! Then go to http://www.Periscope.tv/MaishaRush and come ready with a notebook to jot down all the awesome Rush nuggets I will be giving out!

-Rush

Lighten up but tighten up.

Today I wore a shirt that I really liked. Its an all white tee shirt with the words, thinly but neatly inscribed, ‘Think Positive’. I don’t wear it that often because of my pregnant belly but today I was feeling my vibes so I figured, why not.  I didn’t spend much money on this shirt but I did spend more than usual because I was supporting a small black business. I went about my day remembering the words ‘Think positive’ I was so anxious to display because it was reflective upon how I felt this morning.

As a mom and business owner, I oftentimes do not consider my attire and today was no different. I have on the tee shirt, a pair of leggings (NOT see through), a cami tee and socks; nothing fancy. By the end of the day, my shirt is filled with blood on my shoulder, red sauce on my sleeve. a dirt hand print an my belly and chalk on my butt. I snickered to myself in thoughts of an younger me who would have had all kinds of fits because my clothes are ruined. But as I look at this shirt, one of my favorites, all I see is love.

The blood on  my shoulder is when #8 hurt himself and I swooped him up and rocked him to a calm state. The red sauce is when #9 and I sat outside in the rocking chair sharing some noodles. The dirt hand print is when #7 patted me with excitement as a tractor rolled through our neighborhood. The chalk on my butt is when I sat outside with the RushBunch and drew on the ground. Lets not forget about the stretched belly from #10.

People ask how I do it and I can never give a definitive answer because really, I don’t know myself. All I know is I take life one day at a time and though my days get hectic and I may even cry (from stepping on a lego) my family is an accomplishment I am proud to share with the world.

I take pride in them and my businesses. I run them the same. with ease and love. But never take it too easy because just like children, it will run you ragged if you let it.

I have Mondays off and for the first time in a long time, I took today off from business and focused on myself and self care. I did things that made me smile. Luckily for me that was hanging out with the bunch.

There was a question posed on FB today, what would you get if you could go to any spa. I chuckled at this question because I have never been to a Spa. My reply was, I would settle for an hour of quiet time in the lobby.

Sometimes its the simple things…. Really, its always the simple things.

-Rush

what stinks

Happy Birthday Madison.

running around

The one thing that drives me crazy is the children running around the house when they should being doing school or housework. I am constantly repeating myself about do what meeds to be done then you can have youe fun. 

Such a hypocrite. 

The one thing I am learning about myself is I do the same thing, except its more internal and mental. When I am supposed to be doing one thing my mind is wandered off already, as if disinterested,  onto my next task. And what happens when you lose interest in something? You abandon it. What you find out about being a parent is you soon realize its all relevant. Whatever drives you crazy the most about your children is usually the same exact thing that you need to look inward of yourself. Fix it. 

Life is funny that way. But see, I have a double dose and not because I have 10 children but because I have clients whom I treat like my children. I love them almost instantaneously and I care about their personal, as well as business, well being. Some of them don’t listen and I find myself once again repeating but here’s the kicker, I’M NOT LISTENING TO ME.  So even when they do follow my instructions, I don’t. Then I get those salty phone calls telling me how wonderful my advice was and that they followed it to the letter and received awesome results.  After the call I sit there shaking my head at the very stubborness that drives me crazy about my children. Too busy being distracted and lost what you could have attracted. 

Structure.

This is also a word I have probably hated my whole life but what I do know is it actually works. It takes a lot of time and effort to put it together but once you find your groove everything will flow. If we are on a schedule my life is easy peasy. If not, I oftentimes want to lay in bed tucked under my covers eating buttered toast <— my comfort food, don’t judge me. 

So the next time you are about to yell or fuss at your children, look within first. You will be surprised how much this helps YOU grow. 

-Rush

Down goes Mommy

So today when I stepped outside, I tripped on a stupid rock and before I knew it I was laying flat on my back and my children circling around me. In the biggest panic was McRush and #1. As they ran to my aid, I pleaded with them to just lay there for a moment, They obliged nervously. I just needed a moment for the pain to subside. Ironically all I could think about was the fact that I was laying my freshly washed and detangled fro on the ground filled with rocks and dirt.

I have a high tolerance for pain, clearly being pregnant with child number 10, so I felt discomfort but nothing major.

McRush and #1 pulled me up and I went in the house to sit down. I carried on with my day as usual, because well, that’s what I do best. Keep pushing.

Well, hours later, my back is stiff and my hip is sore. I believe I slightly twisted my ankle and my wrist so I am miserable. To add insult to injury, I feel a cold coming on and I am out of sea moss. Oh, le sigh.

I had planned or working into the morning hours on a couple projects but I am so drained right now. And what’s best is the RushBunch are wide awake. I put on a movie on netflix in my room and they are camping out on the floor tonight. McRush is working tonight. Had I told him I was in pain, he probably would have called off but I think I got this under control. I am blogging then going to bed.

Today we met with a lovely homeschooling Mama and her crew! It was awesome meeting her and hopefully we can collaborate later down the road to do some field trips and swap tricks and tips. I also took that time to bask in the glow of the sun. Unfortunately I only turned grey but I did reap two hour of vitamin D and boosted my melanin magic. AYYYYYYY!

Oh, I know some of you reading are concerned about #10 but rest assured, I have mastered falling while pregnant and he is is moving about like crazy. Thank you for your concerns.

-Rush

Homeschool, sometimes its like that.

Hello iRush family!

It is the final trimester of this pregnancy and everyday I feel it a little more than yesterday but thank goodness for the desire to be great!

So, I have chosen to take a step back, just a little, from homeschooling on such a rigorous schedule. At this point, I teach if I teach and I don’t if I don’t.  Now before you jump on this bandwagon, please note that the RushBunch homeschools year round despite the required 180 days a year so we can afford to skip around. However, just because I am not teaching does not mean that they are not learning. We will oftentimes use the group or montessori method. In group I pair an older child with one or two younger children and let them do an hour worth of various review assignments. In the montessori method my eldest child will teach the class. This semester he opted for science. 

In addition, this year I chose to do binders. Everyone has their own review binder and can go into the binder and pick a subject they wish to work on. For the littles, they have writable work. Basically, I printed out some review work for them and laminated it. I punched holes in it and placed it in a bindet. They can then get a dry erase marker and mark it up and erase it after it is checked. 

We also invested in very affordable iRulu tablets for everyone and though it was a very tedious task, we downloaded age appropriate games and schoolwork for each of them on their own tablets. 

My 11th grader we decided to focus on SAT prep instead of 11th grade work. In addition to the many websites including Khan Academy, I downloaded the SAT prep test and laminated each page for him to work on. He can grab a section, math, science, reading, etc., and practice as much as he needs to. Only I have the key so I do check his work. 

I believe most of you know that one of my children had an IEP in school due to the strength of his [forced] ADHD medication that caused short term memory loss. Well, there is a bimder for that work as well. In addition to tablet work to keep the brain thinking and processing. 
Work was hectic for the majority of this month. Rush Consulting Firm picked up sseveral new clients who posed a challenge to my knowledge. I appreciate these clients most because they push me to continuously grow and learn.

Now it is the end of the month and I am feeling the wind down. But that will not last long because I am hosting an event on the 10th of October plus I am holding  a business business building workshop on Friday the 13th. I am super excited because I lowered my rates for those who really just want to get their business up and running and we will get it all done THAT day! Like, they will literally leave the workshop as a legitimate business owner!

I am so very excited for the success to come for both my RushBunch family and my iRush family. 

-Rush

http://www.RushConsultingFirm.com&nbsp;

Facebook Battles Part 1…. The Slap

Here is another conversation I wound up in because clearly I am glutton for punishment. Your Thoughts?

Scenario: You get a call from school that your 5yr old son hit a little girl in the face, whats your disciplinary move?

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Children fight. They’ll be friends the next day. I would ask questions. Did she hit you? If not we will discuss how hitting someone is only for defending yourself in a situation of physical abuse. Our urge to discipline leads to anger which leads to abuse (from the child to adult) we need to start using these opportunities to TALK.

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Jonny Graham Say it was just his response to something other than her striking him?

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Ask him why he felt compelled to hit her. Did what she did make him mad? If so, ask him why. Then ask him how he thinks he could have better handled it. Let him work it out so you are teaching AND guiding him to make better decisions. Problem solving.

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Jonny Graham If that works for you I’m all for it, I will handle it the same but the difference is the palm of the hand he used gone feel the way that lil girl face felt, thats just me though.

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Lisa BestGroup Admin The little girl could have spit in his damn face. You just enjoy beating the fuck out of your seeds. Just looking for a reason. You are brainwashed and your children will hate you😡

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Maisha Rush We love playing master and slave. Being a parent is about nurturing, encouraging, uplifting, communicating, and most importantly showing our love through our actions. I have 9 with one on the way which means I have many personalities to deal with and one thing I know is that the aforementioned parental attributes work on them all equally.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush You are NOT disciplining him, you are teaching him (with your actions) to not stand up for himself, to not demand he be respected regardless of race gender or religion. These,king are the very attributes that are making our children and young generation cowardice and walking targets to being treated any way because they feel like it is a bad thing to stand up for themselves and be respected.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Break the cycle.

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Jonny Graham If he did this in response to anything other than a physical attack on him, he is the agressor and I dont uphold children in their wrong, the lesson I teach is keep your hands to yourself, and if you dish it you got to be able to take it. I realize that its not always the other person started it, and when I find out I handle it, and that doesnt make me abusive because in the meantime and between time I provide his every want and need, children dont do what they want to do, only what is allowed with me, somebody dont like it come take em to your house and raise em, I turned out just fine and so did my children, who are Grown and one has a child of her own.

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Lisa BestGroup Admin You did not turn out fine. You are a child abuser with a closed mine . I feel sick for your children

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush I have [10] whats one more. You asked my opinion, I gave it. A parent should feel some type of pain, anger, remorse, or regret when succumbing to hitting their child as if to ponder, there has to be a better way. Abuse begat abuse. Some of the most abused children are best “taken care of” that does not negate the abuse.

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Jonny Graham Why are you so full of hate, you don’t know me , why do you attack ME so cavaleirly, everybody entitlted to theyre own opinion, you dont have to agree but damn, at least respect it, if you suppose to be for your people, all I’m speaking is the lack of discipline that children are receiving is the reason we are loosing them early , and we need to get back to that but you calling your own people coons and all this instead of trying to shed some of this light you have that illuminates these black men and women to be coons in your eyes.

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Jonny Graham Yall do know that they just made that a law not long ago in the 90’s, you got your ass tore up at school too, you cant sheild kids from all pain and I dont care how perfect you think you are as a parent you’ll never raise the perfect person, we come here flawed, I really dont see no young people growing up wanting to be nothing anymore but rappers, drug addicts gang members, and ball players, being a part of a big distraction pool for the powers that be, Me and most all the people I grew up with are Business Professionals and Owners but we came from the Ghetto slum and got ass whippings though…

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Lisa BestGroup Admin I hate coons and closed mined child abusers

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Jonny Graham Dont be what you hate.

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Briana Abbott Beat his ass cause your growing a man not a pussy……no man should put his hands on a woman

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Lisa BestGroup Admin Far from it, however I’ll call a duck a duck.

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Lisa BestGroup Admin Bye Briana Abbott adults talking. We are speaking on children not grown men, slaves.

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Briana Abbott Lol…..oh your hot about that let me exit stage left lmao….👀👀👀👈👈

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Briana Abbott Oops 😂😂😂😅

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Perfection is a fallacy. The only perfection you can attain is when you are being and doing your best. No one in their right mind can believe they are raising perfection. I never said that. I homeschool my children and my three oldest already own their own businesses because of the mindset I approach them with and teach them. I not only run my own business but teach other reflections to do the same. None of my children want to be anything mainstream as you mentioned. Its a mindset. You are teaching him that hitting IS appropriate. You call it discipline and so does he. He disciplined her for whatever he felt she did wrong. Just think about it King. I am not saying that no child needs their but popped from time to time but I implore you to talk it out. Life is about learning lessons not being beaten into submission. Haven’t we endured enough of that? You don’t want your child to do something because you are making them do it. You want them to do it because they have the wherewithal to assess the situation and do it because he should. That’s perfection.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Lmbo Briana Abbott RUN GIRL!

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Lisa BestGroup Admin Says a wonderful mother of 10 and she homeschools all of them without beating them💯💯💯

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Jonny Graham Children most times dont know that they should or shouldn’t do something and if its something that is important enough yes Ill make them do it till they understand how important it is and do it on theyre own. You cant reasonably expect all children to be the kind you can talk to all the time , children whose parents dont half ass watch em end up being around and seeing different things and if they go to school they are exposed to alot of other kids whose parents are loose and slack and before you know youre dealing with behaviors that he or she may be mimicking, I dont beat children ass for Everything , like some trying to assume, but a switch is on the menu because I must maintain control because he is my responsibility, and they need to know that they need to conduct themselves like they got some home training and if you buck me I want ass. for at least 18yrs he get a free ride on me , when you grown leave , while you here, I run it. You’ll never have me round here trying to beg and negotiate with no kid of mine. You just need to do what you instructed until I feel you are old enough and learned enough to be given some freedom privileges
Your thoughts?
-Rush

FaceBook Battles Part 2 CHILD SUPPORT

So Occasionally I find myself in the middle of a war of opinions on Facebook. I use the word opinions very loosely because sometimes people’s opinions quickly turn into facts when they feel defeated. Sometimes I am at a lost of understanding how they come to the conclusions that they do but I imagine they feel the same about me. Because I have no desire to pay anyone for posting their name in my blog (not that I have to because its Facebook, thus public property) I will remove the name and their picture, but I am sure someone will try especially knowing the mindset of some people I converse with in these posts. Below is the conversation. I really would like your feedback, not so much who is wrong and who is right, because remember, everyone has a right to their own opinion, but just to see where people stand on this very controversial topic, Child Support.

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Maisha Rush Its hers. Child support is meant to financially co parent in the absence of one or both parents. She did it all, its her back pay. Why would it be his? What did the child do to “deserve” it? She should use it to help him secure himself but that is not an obligation just a grand gesture.

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Jessica Reid That’s like saying what did she do but let a bum nut in her. If dude was in the child’s life, it wouldn’t be “her” money

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Zanobia Rhodes EXACTLY!!!!

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Thats cool. Was just answering what I thought. I do not debate with Queens.

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Jessica Reid Just responding to your thought since it was public

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush I asked my son because yall got me rethinking this. He said its would be mine BUT he would expect. Lil somrthin’ (lol) to which I responded. Logically any good mother would be sure her son is taken care of and probably end up with about 10 grand in the end (if that). His answer surprised me because he is only 17 but I can dig it. Lol

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Jessica Reid But it’s his decision to make since it’s his but ok

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Awesum Ikilla It’s not his that’s why the check isn’t in his name

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Jessica Reid But it’s for his behalf. Y’all acting like y’all doing something that you wouldn’t do if the father was there

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Awesum Ikilla You are doing a lot of something you wouldn’t be doing since the father isn’t there. At the end of the day a child is the product of 2 people and having one is a life commitment. Yes you’re going to have to take care of the child regardless but it shouldn’t be on your own so the money is the other half of help you were entitled to but didn’t get due to the separation. Too many think the mother is owed nothing but the reality of the situation is she does deserve it because the man shouldn’t have left her to do it on her own. The child’s existence is important but the child ain’t paying no bills putting in work.

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Jessica Reid Would you not take care of the child if dad was there? The fact that you feel like you’re “owed” something, that’s your kid!

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Awesum Ikilla It’s child support not child inheritance

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Jessica Reid Which isn’t owed to you!

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Awesum Ikilla As a mother receiving child support I have to say YES I am owed. The kids aren’t solely my own and they do come with extra expenses which I shouldn’t be solely responsible for. So please tell me more how I’m not owed the money I went to the court and was ordered to receive.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush The. Money. Was. Never. The. Childs. It is FOR the child.

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Jessica Reid Your child is owed that money. You aren’t doing a thing that you wouldn’t do if the other parent wasn’t there. You would still be figuring out activities, day care and other expenses for the child. If you feel owed, close your damn legs

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Jessica Reid The. Money. Was. Never. For. You

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush child sup·port

nounSee More

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Jessica Reid See last statement

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Yes SUPPORT.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush sup·port

səˈpôrt/See More

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Jessica Reid Ok the child is now 24. If you still need support when the child’s 24, I suggest you do better in life and stop acting like a debt collector to your child. You’re acting like your child owes you something because you decided to be with a bum

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush At 24 his behind is grown and gone! That support you were supposed to give…… yeah. I did it all. Pay me for the labors you were meant to endure WITH me but left me to do it alone as if this were only MY child.

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Jessica Reid Pay you for the labor that you would’ve been doing anyways. Basically, because you just had to let a nigga nut, your child has to pay for it?

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Hahahaha. Not actually birth labor sis, I.meant the labor of raising a child ALONE. Of course you went through labor alone. Smh. Some things you would not have been doing ALONE had he been there. It is much more labor intensive to do it alone than it is with the other parent that is why child support is implemented because this is a fact.

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Jessica Reid Labor, actual work you would’ve done with the child. Again, you your child’s debt collector because you decided to procreate with a bum? I’m still waiting to see what things you wouldn’t have done if the father was there. Would junior not have activities that you and he paid for? Would you not pay for food, shelter or clothes for your child if dad was there?

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush The struggle queen. We are talking about the struggle. If this were not a known fact then child support would never have been implemented. Maybe you couldn’t afford to have a good roof over their heads because you struggled doing it alone. With my first child I was homeless twice while his father was living it up in his five bedroom home. I had to beg foe food on the corner. I starved for a year, literally. I was given hand me downs from time to time, slept in shelters. It was a struggle. He didn’t care. I had my lights turned off because my son needed uniforms for school and supplies, and food. THAT is where the support should have eased the labor. These are the things child support are supposed to help with. I got fired from a job for taking off too many times for school meetings/functions/registration or because he was sick. THAT is where that support should help. THAT is the purpose of child support. And still going without because you, as a parent continue still to pay college tuition, graduations, etc. That’s is what I meant by “back pay” and easing labor pains.

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Jessica Reid Again, if dad was there, you along with dad would be providing food, home, clothing, etc. If you want back pay from being an adult, I suggest you go back to your mama’s coochie

No automatic alt text available.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush I don’t need a violin sis. I’m good. You asked for examples. I gave them. Smh. Why? Through my struggles I own businesses and never have to stoop to demeaning and attempting to belittle someone who answers questions and tells their story. That’s not what this was about. It was a conversation between grown people with opinions. Sometimes petty isn’t called for. I don’t want or need back pay.

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Jessica Reid Obviously you did because you’re stating things you would’ve done anyway, tying it to a sob story to elicit sympathy. Don’t talk about how you don’t need nor want back pay now because you’re in your feelings. If your child is 24 and you still talking about needing back pay for being an adult and taking care of your responsibilities, you need to go back into your mama’s coochie

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush I was answering the question.

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Awesum Ikilla The problem with your mindset Jessica is that your mentality is taking the mother for granted. It’s the attitude that deadbeats adopt to not feel guilty for their faults on failing to uphold an obligation. It’s immature from my viewpoint and kind of immoral. Your opinion is literally the opposite of the law for a reason maybe you should rethink with some consideration it’s the only way you’ll really get the big picture.

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Jessica Reid How? Again what exactly are you not doing as a mother or an adult that you now have to do because dad isn’t in the picture? Are you not feeding your child? Clothing them? Providing shelter? If a man said this in regards to a deadbeat mother, y’all would be up in arms.

If you need back pay for being an adult and taking care of your responsibilities, your parents should’ve swallowed you

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Awesum Ikilla Example 1 Daycare 1500 month with 2 parents that’s 750 each …. but you’re single your other half just failed to support you.
Example 2 you’re offered a job making 50k working the night shift. But WAIT there’s nobody home with Jon Jon at night because you are alone raising him so instead you take the 25k 9-5 that works with his school schedule you just lost out on 25k because you have no support for the child it took 2 to make. … meanwhile Reggie your baby daddy is making 80k a year with 2 jobs he has time for becuz he left the kid with you cuz fuck it you gotta be a mom regardless.
Example 3 Kiki wants to be a cheerleader it’s 400 sign up 50 in gas a week to get her there( I’m not even going to mention finding the time) you are single so you are paying the 400 plus 200 a month in gas alone that’s 600. 600/2=300 but Wait you was going to be a mom anyway so let’s not talk about the possible 700 that could’ve gone else where girl Bye !

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Awesum Ikilla Give me my back pay and let the little child less, or new girlfriend, or dick riders, or deadbeats or whoever think whatever they want

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Jessica Reid So basically you want to be paid for being an adult? You a basic bitch

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Jessica Reid And side note: if you’re giving up a job making $50K because of lack of a sitter, you’re stupid

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Awesum Ikilla its not stupid single parent struggles are real

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Awesum Ikilla and its not getting paid for being an adult its back pay for the part that shouldve been contributed girl you are wrong just stop. your argument has been surpassed by scholars who have created laws to protect the right people from the habits of the wrong doers.

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Jessica Reid No, you’re stupid if you can’t take a $50K job because of lack of sitter. If you’re making $50K and cannot find a sitter, you ain’t trying. Basic ass

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Awesum Ikilla say you have a roomate rent is 1000 both of y’all are on the lease yall agreed on 50/50 if you end up paying the 1000 every month while your roommate stayed for free you better go to court and get them to pay their half to you. According to your motto your roommate would be in court arguing that you was staying there anyway so why do you think you should get paid for being an adult and the time has already passed so whats the point just move on with your life.

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Awesum Ikilla who do you know thats going to come to your house from 12-6 am to watch your child since you are so smart and sure about possible scenarios? when will they start and can you trust them with your child are they reliable when will they get paid? can you afford them and your bills?…. Girl its so much more whedoing things on your own and that’s why they have child support.

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Maisha Rush
Maisha Rush Queen, let it go Awesum Ikilla
Now, please note how I should have stopped conversing with this young lady long ago as I said I would in the very beginning…. Shame on me for not listening to my wiser self.
I would like to know your thoughts on the matter.
-Rush