Dear covid…..

Hey y’all. I hope everyone is safe out here in these covid streets.

A lot has happened since I last blogged. Business shifts, financial shifts, and more importantly personal shifts.

After YEARS of working my business o am just now realizing that I need to take care of me too. I mean I bathe and stuff but its deeper than that right. I have decided to hire a cleaning crew to come to the house. And right now I am looking for a Day nanny.

I know people have been saying self care for years and things like “you can’t pour from an empty cup”. My cup has been empty so long that I have just been used to the drain. Being a mom is running a business and in many aspects so is marriage. Then to actually be running a business, being a mentor, and volunteering can definitely take its toll.

I incorporated baths into my regime. Yes, baths. I shower everyday, sometimes twice a day. But nothing relaxes you like locking your bathroom door and sitting in a hot tub… maybe even bubbles. I deserve bubbles right. 😉

But more importantly I am incorporating delegating because just because we can do it all doesn’t mean we should. There are things we need to do,, especially as moms, and Madam Maxine Waters said, reclaim our time.

My babies are healthy and my husband is happy so I think I do a pretty good job. But at the end of the day I am absolutely burned out.

I hired a coach to get my business life together because like I say all the time, if your coach doesn’t have a coach then they are a hypocrite. How can I, as a coach, tell you that you need a business coach but not have one myself. I have had several coaches over the years and its time I added me to the list of things to support. (My coach would agree) I have decided to take an hiatus from the fave of the business to work the back end and hire those who can help.

Covid has caused many of us to transition to virtual meetings and meet ups with our friends and family but what I take it as is we all need a moment to slow down.

I am grateful to be among the many untouched by this crazy thing and I am praying for all those who may not be able to say the same. We have to take control of the things in our life that beat us down like pushing too much or looking for perfection before pursuing our goals. Your happiness should be a goal.

Are you happy?

Is my living in vain?

In the midst of this dark cloud lingering over my head, I am forced to work through tears shed.

No matter what I am doing, in the blink of an eye, I will find myself crying. I snickered to myself appreciating the fact that I do not wear make up. What a waste it would be right now.

Funny, no matter what we go through as parents we still must be sure our children are living their best life. For me that is forcing a smile with uncertainties lingering like a lone cloud on a sunny day.

Isn’t it ironic how we do so many good deeds and it feels, sometimes, as though they measure up to nothing? I remember when I was a young girl, my mom told be to be sure that my good far outweighed my bad. I literally live by that staple. Yet, I now find myself perplexed as to why.

Why then, do I still endure such unbelievable pain? Why is it life seems a constant test? When the heck is the exam so I can pass already!

I don’t know everything there is to know about life, but I do know this, its yours to live. Choose happiness and pass it on.

I’ll tell you what. When my daughter passed away I no longer took each moment I had with my children for granted. Not that I ever did but every breath seems even more previous to me. That is part of my reason for homeschooling. I always say that God has given me a charge (or 10) and I take that charge very seriously. These are little people who will soon try to find their own place in the world. It is my job to assist them as much, and as early, as possible.

Does my heart hurt every morning? Absolutely.

Do I have butterflies since this incident. Always.

But it will not stop my unwavering love and care. I push through, as we all do.

Am I always going to get it right? Nope.

Is my living in vain. Of course not.

Day two

Today was harder than yesterday. I had to sniff dinner for a slice of mental satisfaction. I am light headed but I think that is all in my mind because there have been plenty days where I have inadvertently eaten way less than these smoothies and celery. I will admit that I have had a bit more clarity- when I am not thinking of food. Oh my gosh, a whopper right now though! I would like to add that, even though I know your weight fluctuates on this challenge, I am still going to take pride in the fact that I lost three and a half pounds in one day. My detox tea I ordered from Amazon will be in tomorrow too, apparently I was supposed to have some on hand before starting but better late than never right.

I was able to come up with a few financial plans for myself and family. My goal is to help as many people as I can build a foundation of generational wealth, whether it be from starting your own company or investing/saving. I have decided to get back into multi level marketing, or mlm as some may know it. I had my eyes on this one venue but I have been introduced to something else so now I have to make a decision…or do I? I have no problem with multiple streams of income especially when I can afford the initial start up cost which for some companies can be astronomical. I will keep you posted as to which ones I am looking into and choose. I have no problem passing on information.

As far as homeschooling, today was pretty basic, I actually let Te’ teach the children their math essentials and number recognition. He seems to make it more fun than I do so I may have to start paying him for his services and hire him on Tuesdays. I have also come to realize that my children absorb knowledge better in the evenings. So, I will now be teaching them in the evenings after they have played out all of their energy. This also works in my favor because I have decided to give social media a rest for awhile so I can focus on good old fashion foot work. Yep, I am getting out and hitting businesses face to face. I am a little nervous because while this is nothing new to me, I have a direct goal to meet by November so I have to be more firm and not so passive which is hard for me because I am a big ol’ softy. You can pull on my heart strings with a sneeze.

I think that about covers it for today.

-Rush
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