What you’re NOT going to do is….

Today, like any other Saturday, I got up to take the girls to Ballet.

Also, as usual, #10 woke up at 7 leaving me with a hopeful thought of laying back down for a few, HA!

Unlike any other Saturday, McRush had to work so I contemplated getting the rest of the RushBunch up to tag along. Hmmm, I opted NO! Generally, I use this day as a girls day. We go to ballet and then we go out to eat. Well, today I decided to bring #10 and #9 who are 8 months and 2 years old.

I squeezed them into my Lexus because I was not driving the Transit, and headed on my merry way. I dropped the girls off and normally I would just hang around the area, reading a book or perusing Facebook or Instagram. Not a chance! #9, in all of his newly potty trained glory has to ‘poop’ so I drive to the Walmart (why do we say THE walmart?) and then it gets interesting. Realizing I have no stroller, I carry #10 after fighting with his carseat and we slowly, due to little two year old legs, walk to the restroom. I decide to grab a cart to help make things easier but alas, no carts allowed in the restroom. Of Course! I grab the baby and my pocket book out of the cart and take #9 to the stall.

Well, there are no liners for the seat but there is a kiddie chair in the stall so I can put #10 in, except its broke. Of course! I sling baby to the side and pull tissue down to line the seat all while fighting with my purse to stay on my shoulder and convince #9 to ‘hold it’ just a little longer. I finally get him on the seat and now I am sweating. I wipe him and pick him up to wash his and my hands. The dryer doesn’t work. Of course!

I place them back in the cart I parked outside the bathroom and not even 25 feet away we get and, “I have to poop.” I roll my eyes and hold back tears. By now we are running late to pick up #6 whose class finishes before #3. I start the process over again and as I am walking out of the stall, OF COURSE my pregnant butt has to pee!

We finally make it out of Walmart, get # 6 and head to the park to kill time. One child wants the swing and one wants to run around while the other wants to slide…. I only have one set of eyes, and they are rolling!

We figure it out though. We leave and get #3, grab a bite to eat and head home.

I have a headache.

I said all this to say, I am not a supermom, please do not call me that. I thought I was a supermom too. I mean I do after all, have 10 children with one on the way, while homeschooling, and running a business. But from now on what you are not going to do is call me a supermom when I feel like I need a drink and a blunt after spending 3 hours with less than half of my children! They are exhausting.

What am I, a married mom who has a phenomenal support team in my husband and oldest two children (whom I left home sleeping their lovely heads off (never again)).

I say all the time that we are all supermoms in our own rights but after today, I believe that title belongs to single parents. I just don’t know how you do it!

I salute you!

iRush

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Ya’ll alright?

How’s my homeschooling mamas?

I am so excited about this year! We started school on the 6th and while this is not my first go around with homeschooling, I have learned so many new sites and platforms over the summer that my children will probably be confused. I am like a kid in a candy store, I want some of everything!

For those of you who do not know, we are option 3 homeschoolers which basically means, as far as the school board is concerned, you leave me alone and I will leave you alone. Honey, because I do not have time!

The biggest obstacle for me is my littles -3 and under. I just want to get in with them and play in the mud and find worms, talk about particles and fossils, rocks and dirt. You know, the fun stuff! But my older children want to do big kid stuff… they’re so boring!

I Kid.

So this year I am going to teach the littles while my bigs are at recess! Ah HA! Chile, these epiphanies I have are so simple but great at the same time, like why didn’t I think of this 4 years ago? Nevertheless, here I am enjoying the train ride, no matter how slow. lol

Today we did basics like math, handwriting, and French. So tomorrow we are freed up to do life science! I swear I am more excited than the children… No, really. We will be learning about the life cycle of a butterfly. Hopefully, I will be able to upload video to our YouTube page, MsMyRush <—- Plug!

My 17-year-old has 1 more credit he needs so this year he will only be studying for his ACT and the credit he will be achieving is computer technology which consists of him moving and rebuilding my website while creating his own YouTube page. Yes! Use them, honey. Makes less work for me and gains knowledge for him #WinWin

Well, that’s my check-in for today, let me get my giddy butt ready for bed.

iRush

Grand rising!

Why am I up?

Its 6:23 a.m. and I have actually been up since 2:57. I think I may have gone to bed by 10 something.

#10 has 4 teeth cutting at the same time in addition to the two teeth that have already cut through but are still sprouting. He is in pain and his fever makes him uncomfortable. What that means for me is no sleep.

Add to that that I am trying to alter the RushBunch curriculum for the day because I saw something cool for them to learn for science.

Plus Souki, our new edition, decided to make my floor her personal bathroom. By the time I soothed #10, cleaned up my floor, packed McRush’s lunch and threw on a load of laundry (because I’m a mom and mom’s have MADD, Mother Attention Deficit disorder) I am now wide awake and contemplating whether or not to lay down while everyone is asleep. πŸ€”

School has been off to rocky start and revamping the business has left me less than motivated but I will keep in pushing because its about something greater than me. Its about my family and my reflections. But trust me when I tell you that this queen here is going to a spa and hair salon because I have to keep pushing doesn’t mean I have to LOOK like all I am doing is pushing.

I have learned that In order to best serve those I love, I must first serve and love me.

iRush

Who wants to be a mommy?

Oh it has definitely been one of those days!

We had nothing scheduled and both #1 and McRush were off of work. So I was so set to sleep in. I literally day dreamed about it all day Saturday and laid my head on the pillow knowing what a glorious well needed rest I was going to have. This was at around eleven at night.

Well, as life would have it, I was back up at 12:30 so send the dog out and get #7 up to go to the bathroom. Oh, by the way, I got a dog. 🀦🏾

Okay, that’s cool because I am sleeping in anyway.

At 3 this morning, my bladder was full, baby jumping on it I suppose. Now I have to go to the bathroom. Wash my hands add some lotion and come out to see Souki, the dog, peed on the floor. I get the Clorox wipes and clean it up and then wash and moisturize my hands again. OF COURSE I’m thirsty so I grabbed a bottle of water and chug quickly so I can jump back in the bed.

Yup, you guessed it, 6:30 I’m up with #10. Downstairs I go to get a bottle but I’m not worried because he goes back to sleep after a warm bottle, burp, and change…. Not today. By the time he goes back to sleep it is 9:27 a.m. and I am exhausted. I lay down because everyone else is still asleep. I figure 10:30ish they will rise because they were up late, intentionally because of my hopes of sleeping in of course.

Ha!

Promptly at 9:45 they are calling my name and I jump up now thinking I overslept… yeah right.

I decide to go ahead and start breakfast and take the dog out. I found myself doing laundry, writing the grocery list, cleaning the living room and kitchen, and writing our house rules list.

You know who did get to sleep in? McRush, #1 and #2 which left me with a house full of unruly under 7 year olds.

At 1230 I remember I was supposed to meet a lady to pick up a baby blender (gotta love mom swap). Now I’m rushing to get everyone ready and feed #10 while finishing up my chores. You know what happened? McRush jumps in the shower!! Ugh! I didn’t even get to shower! He says just take one of your two minute showers. I all but lost my dang mind!

Now its 10:45 at night and I have just now been able to wind down.

Everyday I am the last down and the first up.

Holy Ancestors Batman! When is mom going to get a break!?

Okay, I’m calm. Tomorrow is Monday and school is going to be SO exciting. ←insert sarcasm and say that through your teeth.

iRush

Hacks and hiccups w/ iRush

When it comes to parenting everyone wants to offer their expert advice, and by expert, I mean mothers with children and degreed nonparents. Well, rest assured that I am not here to offer you advice, prejudge or even tell you what you should be doing.
Even as a mother of ten, yup 10 children, I do not consider myself an expert mommy. On the contrary, I still learn new things every day. What I will offer are some mommy hacks and tips that keep me from running away from home on a daily basis.
Don’t worry. This is not some ‘How to get organized’ article because around here we run off of 80% chaos and 20% right in the nick of time.
As a wife, mother, and business owner there is always something to do and something else that needs to be done, like, LITERALLY. I am up and running before my feet hit the floor in the morning but I still have to feel special. That leads me to my very first tip.
1. Do you.
Oh my gosh, for years I was miserable as a parent, no lie. I gave up law school, smoking, drinking, cussing, and OH MY GOD, coffee! I was trying to be the best mom I could be for my family but I lost myself in the process. Everything I did was for someone else. Then one day I walked past the mirror and had to step back to reassess who this bum was in my house. Adorned in sweatpants, a holy t-shirt with a UFO (unidentified food) stain on my shoulder, mismatched socks, and a very unkept ponytail. “Did I wash today?” I couldn’t have its only 6 a.m. and I look like last week. No ma’am/sir, don’t let this be you. Set a day to get out of the house even if you go down to the local coffee shop and watch Netflix on your phone. Give you some ‘you time’. It helps, trust me.
2. Stop saving everything.
Even before I had a baseball team of children I could not stand clutter and unnecessary paraphernalia. That includes the plethora of pictures laying around. Trust me no one is coming to your house to look at photo albums full of baby pictures. Put them on a hard drive and they will be just as safe as in an album. I am the queen of decluttering. In my house, if you haven’t used it in a month, its trash. I am logical though, although my husband would definitely disagree. The purpose of this hack is two things. 1. It helps keep the house clean and 2. a clean house helps keep a clear mind and who doesn’t want a clear mind when you have children, right.
3. Price hop
Now let me first say that I hate shopping. I hate store hopping. I hate long lines. I hate waiting. (Hate is such a strong word…. Yup, still hate it.) Always think, can I get this cheaper? The answer is probably yes, but the cheaper usually means longer wait time (insert lines and shipping). For example, my family is book lovers. I can easily spend a thousand dollars on books from Amazon and Barnes and Noble in a day and that is not exaggerating in the least. However, I have found that a quick trip to the library or local school can get me a trunk load of books for five bucks! No lie. We catch sales at The Children’s Place as well. Now going back to hack #2 I do not buy a size up, sales always come around.
4. Write. Sing. Dance.
Find a release every day. For my mom it was singing, she has such a beautiful voice, something I cannot say I inherited, but I do like writing (can’t you tell). I have a blog that I post in, not as often as I like but I do write down little bits daily in an effort to write a blog about it. Writing is therapeutic for me, it always has been. Plus these are things that won’t take away from parenting duties. You can dance with your children, sing to them, or write with them. Its all in fun and release.
5. Go to timeout more often.
We need breaks during the day. I send the children outside and watch them play from the window as I sip tea and enjoy the quiet. Although I am not an advocate of television, I will pop in a learning DVD so the children will calm down momentarily to help me catch my breath. Children hate timeouts but they are so lovely when you are a parent. Sometimes I hide in the nook of my closet for a few and pretend we were playing hide and seek. Either way, you choose to do it, send yourself to time out more often, you’ll thank me later.
6. Bribery
Yup, bribery, and even blackmail if it works. It’s usually bribery for the little humans and blackmail for the bigs. Children can be bribed with more than candy too, (we want to avoid bad habits and cavities). A trip to the park, a fruit salad, a visit to grandma, anything that makes them smile and gives you peace. Unfortunately, I don’t get to use blackmail on my bigs often because they are pretty well-behaved children. Maybe I’ll be able to use it in a few years on my littles.
7. Quick Meals
We are not meat eaters so the crock pot is a no go for us. But I can throw a whole meal together in 15 minutes and that includes plating. Remember, we are 80% chaos so I never plan meals. Who needs that kind of stress right. I usually grab some veggies and create some type of concoction. The downside to this is a meal is rarely able to be duplicated in this house, but I hate repeat meals anyhow so it actually works for us. But if you are meat lovers, go friend a crockpot, it makes life so much easier.

That’s all I have for now.

iRush

πŸ€” Now what?

I don’t know how to do this y’all. This… nothing. Right now that’s exactly what I should be doing, especially since its my birthday.

Though the things happening in our life right now are all out of my control, I cannot help but feel like its my fault. Its what I do by nature. Whenever an issue arises I check myself first to see what I did that could have contributed to the ruckus. What action did I take, or not take, to start this snowball effect? That leaves me in a tough spot of sorting should haves, could haves, and would haves. If only I made a left instead of a right….

Though I know there is nothing I could have done, I wonder if there was something I should have done. We make life confusing sometimes.

I assure you things could be a lot worse, like A LOT. But oftentimes its the little things that make you halt.

McRush is fine. My pregnancy is going well. The RushBunch is fine and for those of you who noticed in my last blog, no, #9KidsAndCounting was not a typo.

My niece I have been raising since infancy is going to stay with my mom. It has been a decision a long time in the making, one that I refused to succumb to. But, I know that it is something I must do.

In life we get overwhelmed by the choices we’ve made but we still try to make the best decisions for our families. I thought that keeping her with the RushBunch was best but due to circumstances beyond…. FAR beyond my control, I know this is best.

While this decision absolutely breaks my heart and I worry about the ramifications therein, I have learned that sometimes in life we have to release. Whether it’s a habit, a job, or a person, let it go.

I suppose after the baby, Eleven, is born I can reclaim the hash tag of 10KidsAndCounting although we will no longer be counting. πŸ˜‰

I also considered keeping the hash tag in honor of my daughter who passed away but that leads to questions and I usually don’t like to talk about it.

What do you think?

-Rush

Ch Ch Changes.

I have received emails and messages regarding my, and my family’s, well being. I get texts and phone calls wondering if everything is alright. First of all, thank you, second of all, to be blunt, honest, and direct; No. No, everything is not alright. I am falling into shambles but it’s not necessarily in a horrible way. It’s bad, yes. But I am embracing it as new beginnings.

I have contemplated telling this for weeks but I have contemplated these decisions for even longer than that. One decision I cannot reveal just yet as it is still in the works but this decision is the biggest one I have ever EVER had to make in my entire life. It is scary and its heartbreaking. The worst part is it is just the beginning. I will make a lot of enemies over this decision, or shall I say, my enemies will show their faces. That’s the scariest part but I have to do what is best for me and my family and I have to stop being a coward about it.

The decision I CAN tell you about is almost as disheartening but also has been a long time coming. For whatever reason, I tend to hold on to people and things that no longer serve any good in my life. And while I enjoyed it, it was emotionally, physically, mentally and financially draining. I kept going because it fell in with my passion which was helping my people. But it left me burned even in my niceness and determination to thrive.

If you have ever been a client of mine, more than likely you received an email that says this:

‘Hello. I wanted you to be the first to hear that I am shutting down Rush Consulting Firm as you know it, effective this weekend.

For almost 10 years I have run this company and I have loved every minute of it; it is my pride and joy. I LOVE helping my people follow their hearts and turn their passion into a paycheck, however, the business has not been beneficial to my family for a long time. The long hours, traveling, and debt that come with running any business has taken a toll on not only myself but my growing family as well. I will be able to assist you and/or refer you if needed, moving forward but this email will no longer be available. If you need to reach me, Rush.Consulting@yahoo.com’

Yup. That’s it. I am dismantling my business. Not just this one, but Slips Socks and Bows, and Heels and Hustle as well. I have already canceled our family site, http://www.iRush.life and I will be having blowout sales on remaining paraphernalia in the coming days. The decision to shut down my businesses piggybacks off of the anguish and heartache that I have in the aforementioned decision that we made. I am sure I will be unable to function in the capacity needed to be prosperous until I regain my composure.

I will continue to post for encouragement and still push for you to start your businesses but I will also be transferring my knowledge to youtube videos instead of consultations. So in a way, I guess you can say I’m giving it all away for free so keep a lookout for the page.

I will focus more on my family because, at this time, it is where I am needed most. I will try to do better at blogging and keep you guys abreast of whats happening, both good and bad. I cannot, however, guarantee that I will be keeping my facebook page.

#9KidsAndCounting

-Rush

View More: http://foreverinamemoryphotography.pass.us/rushfamily2017

Stepping back

You would never have convinced me that I would be here today. Never in a million years.
I was on the fast track to being a lawyer. I was a beast! I was attending school full-time year round and managed to juggle two jobs at the same time plus I managed to maintain a B average. I was focused and diligent. My home was immaculate due to my slight, okay overbearing OCD. I even managed to go out every now and again.

Now look at me, Married, 10 children, and successful business owner. People would think I was living the life, yet I have days of inadequacies when I fall short of feeling great. Truth is, I have those days more often than not. The days where I want to just quit.
Being a mother is something I never foresaw for myself let alone 10 children. I never would have thought I would be married. I always figured it wasn’t in the cards for me, seeing as I was going from one jerk to another.
Yet here I am.

What is the point of this blog?
This blog is for all the people who feel like I am some type of super mom because I homeschool 10 children while maintaining my home and successful business, but the truth is, I get burned out. I want to scream sometimes. And there are many days that I go without just to get it all done. But I get tired too.

For those that do not regularly follow my blog, two of my blessings are not mine biologically and that has sometimes taken a toll on my life because of the unwanted input and opinions placed on me and McRush, I swear some days I just want to change my number and block everyone I know. It’s hard enough raising children but to have the constant selfish interference can take its toll on even the strongest of moms.

After the death of my daughter and still-born experience of my son, I just want to be left alone most of the time. No one seems to get that. I am forced to put on an extrovert face when all I want to do is curl up on the couch and read a book and close myself off from the world.

Is that selfish? Probably, but I have spent all of my life being selfless to people who could care less about me. Smiling and giving. Now, I have nothing left to give to myself.

I am very grateful for each and every one of my babies, both birthed or blessed my handsome husband McRush, and my business where I get to help people live out the life they always wanted. But for right now, I think I need a vacation.

iRush

View More: http://foreverinamemoryphotography.pass.us/rushfamily2017

What is your happiness moms?

So I have been pushing through some issues in life and sometimes it is hard to see clearly when you are a mom. That is not to take anything from you fathers out there but like I tell McRush all the time, I can only speak from the perspective of a mom and wife.

There is always someone who wants to pass you some advice that’s common sense but really not logical like, “take a nap when the children take a nap”. This of course going off the assumption that you can get all of your children down for a nap simultaneously. In addition, while this may seem a good idea, most moms know that this is the most opportune time to actually get some work done without the children in the way calling you for everything.

Another one I find hilarious is, “you have to take time out in the day for yourself”. My response,and the response of many moms is, I can’t even pee in peace. Where exactly is that time located because I have been looking.

I watched Red Table today and heard something profound. Something I have always known to be true and even experience but it was put into words. It’s the assumption that I am doing a great job because I maintain my family and every one around me is doing well as a result of my encouragement and tenacity to be there for them. But no one, not even me, considers me.

I found myself questioning why I am. And while that may sound borderline suicidal, I assure you it is anything but. My inward emotions in no way reflect my outward appearance. I have everything I could ever want. Even under the presence of the full moon there is nothing I can ask for to make my life better. Inwardly, however, I feel like something is missing. It’s crazy because I am doing exactly why I love to as far as business and my family is picture perfect.

What is it then? I have lost myself. There are questions I can ask myself and not know the answers.

What do you like to do for fun?

What is your favorite color?

What makes you happy?

What makes you laugh from your soul?

So, that is my new quest, to make myself as happy as I make the people around me. Its going to be a bumpy ride but I have my seatbelt on. πŸ˜‰

What is your happiness?

-Rush

Pineapples. Nasty Sex. Uncle.

Some people wonder how I manage to get it all done in a day. I am often called supermom or superwoman. I am neither of these things. I am just an everyday woman trying to live my best life now.
With 10 children and a business, I definitely have my days and at 11:04 p.m. its hardly began to end.
The post topic is keywords I have used or set to use when I am at my wit’s end. Today I need all three. Today started out rough. I woke up late. I didn’t get to do the things around the house that I wanted to do and I was rushed which means I forgot to pack a few things for our trip to the beach, which was amazing by the way.
I am a part of this awesome stay at home mom group where the women look and think and struggle just like me. It is a beautiful feeling to connect with such beautiful kindred souls.
However, I am sure I do not have to tell you how stressful a day at the beach is with 10 children and daddy couldn’t make it. Constant counting, chastising, searching, and the famous interruptions. But in between those moments, I was able to talk on an adult level.
Packing up…not so fun. The drive home…even worse. everyone in the car fell asleep including me a couple times. But we made it safely.
I stopped by the grocery store to pick up veggies for dinner and came home to cook for everyone except me, because I am now Raw Vegan, that in itself can be stressful. I made a salad for myself and waited until McRush was finished putting my radiator in so we can eat together. He didn’t finish until almost 10:30 and by then I was exhausted from cooking, bathing, cleaning, singing, fussing, and feeding #10.
Unbeknownst to McRush that I was waiting on him, he came in and started eating… without me. I am so tired and flustered that I have a migraine and, after I blog, I still have to do some client work.
Being a mom is hard. You want to remain soft and gentle yet firm and strong, the attempt to balance is stressful.
I oftentimes feel bad (and so I don’t) mentioning these woes to McRush because he empathizes with me but I wonder if he gets it. He gets it enough to step in and had I asked, he would have but then my car wouldn’t be fixed.
BTW, I no longer want my salad.
-iRush

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