Well that WAS a bumpy ride.

I was looking back on some old blogs and decided to look back at my very first blog. March 2, 2016. 😬

Its exciting to keep a log, or in my case a journal, to be able to actually see how far you’ve come because sometimes it feels like we’re not moving at all. 🤗

Let’s take a look. *I changed and/or edited nothing. Look past the poor writing* 🤭

Today I have decided to take charge of the direction in my life. I thought I had already done that but I was only fooling myself. Looking back at all the things I have set out to do there was no true purpose, no goal, no passion. An idea would pop into my head and I would run with it. I have approximately 17 websites I have purchased, dozens of cards I have ordered, and countless social media pages I have sat for hours setting up. None of which I use, half of them I do not remember. There was no true direction I had no true desire to diligently work any of the ventures I’d embarked on. I am 36 years old still toying with life. I should be much further than I am right now. Of course, I have no problems where I am right now, a wife, mother, entrepreneur; as we have already clearly established. But I want more. I know, who doesn’t want more? I don’t mean more money, not that I would turn it down, I mean more purpose. I want more reason to say I am who I am. Although you can google me, I think that’s cool. But really, no one wants to live without a purpose. How does one find their meaning to life? What do I have to  do to know my calling? Of all my ideas and endeavors which one is meant for me?

I used to want to be a juvenile defense lawyer working predominately pro bono cases. I thought that was where my heart lied. When I was 15 I was sent to a detention center for stealing. I was appointed some fresh out of college guy who never asked me if I was guilty (which I was but that’s not the point). I met with him once and he didn’t even ask me my name. he walked up to the table I was sitting at along with other first time children. I was a nervous wreck, I could’ve peed on myself right there. My palms were sweating and I could feel my heart beating through my throat. He stood over me and said ”you are going to plea guilty and they will give you one year”. My eyes widened as tears inadvertently streamed down my cheeks. I felt sick to my stomach. He asked if I understood. I said no. ”with all the evidence they have against you, you could be looking at 15 years, its best this way, trust me.” I said okay knowing there was no evidence because there was no evidence (story for another day). I was just a frightened little girl who hung with the wrong crowd on the wrong day. I went back to the hall where 25 other young ladies stayed awaiting their fate and I cried. One of the guards came over to check on me. I told her what the man said and she explained to me that they all come in and say that, it makes their case load lighter and frees up some of their time. I remember being outraged. How could you have me throw my life away like that? From that day until the very moment I am writing this I have read and continue to read hundreds of law books, studying case law for fun. I vowed to sincerely help the children who are victimized by the system by making them plea out; even innocent ones I found out. I believed from that day it was my calling, my destiny to help children fight for their freedom.

I went to school for paralegal studies, I figured I would take that route because so many others who aspired to be a lawyer were majoring in English, I hated English, as some of my writing skills may reflect but I am working on it. But as I furthered on in school life happened and I dropped out vowing to return. I took on three jobs and became a single mother. Returning didn’t happen for ten years. I returned and hit a stumbling block, the school I had attended in preparation to transfer to a university, no one accepted the credits. Feeling defeated I quit. I tried at it again online but that was unrealistic for me.

I found myself working to support my family trying my hand at many things but finding myself bored no matter how prosperous my ventures had become. Now I am a housewife raising nine children and a husband still trying to find my purpose in this crazy world.

Fasten your seatbelts, the road may get bumpy.

-Rush

And boy has it been bumpy. I no longer have the two children we fostered. They have been reunited with their parents. I’m still a housewife but more spoiled. 🥰 we have had 4 more children (birthed). I homeschool them all (minus those who graduated). Started a consulting firm, made 6 figures, hired staff, and traveled for business AND leisure. Been on Business Talk Radio, a few podcasts, the news, a handful of shows, and the paper. I’ve been nominated for a few awards (no wins 🤷🏾‍♀️). Helped hundreds of small business owners scale, entrepreneurs start, and corporations stabilize.  Sold the contracts to “retire” and now starting it back up again! I have lost over 120 pounds and took control of my heath.  We’ve bought a house later that year as well.

Life went from seeming like a mess with no direction to soaring with the stars. I love it here! ❤️

Five things you do for fun.

List five things you do for fun.

Oh this is a wild one because it varies even in my life.

My life goes so fast I don’t even realize I had fun until I’m talking to somebody about it. 🤷🏾‍♀️

When I was younger, the five things I did for fun was club hop, drink, hang out with my best friend which probably entailed flirting with some random guys, joy ride with no destination, and people watching. You know, when you critique the people walking by while we sat on the patio. 🤣

As I got older, the five things that I like to do would absolutely bore the younger me. Researching which usually sends me down a ridiculous rabbit hole that will last for weeks until I get an explanation I am satisfied with. Reading, learning new languages, actually resting my body, and sleep. Its sounds like a laid back life but its so exciting. 🫣

NOW, in addition to those things, I do anything that makes a memory. With my husband, my children, and my friends. This includes things I would never think of like skydiving.

I feel like, at 47, married and with 12 children, I have already lived a full life so now my “fun” focus is on creating memories to hold my loved ones through the grief of me no longer being here.

For example, I spent new years eve this year dressed all up and having a tea party with my littlest girls, 3, 5, and 6. That’s my new fun.

Fun is what you make it and making things fun IS fun.

M.

What makes a good leader.

What makes a good leader?

This is such a good question to which there are many avenues to the right answer.

Some will say compassion. Compassion is good but can lead to someone who may bend the rules or look the other way. Compassion means that you are leading with emotion, which Compassion is, and that is not a good thing overall as a leader.

Some will say honesty. Also good, but honesty can be brutal if not given the right way under the right circumstances with the right person. That’s just too many variables to lay on a leader as a sole quality.

Some will say work ethic. This is a great but oftentimes does not balance out for a good leader. Having a great work ethic is good for a business but being a leader isn’t about business, its about leading.

Bottom line is, there are many points that will go into being a good leader but really, it depends on the type of leader you need.

Any attribute desired for this “good leader” must be divisible. Meaning he or she must know when to apply the qualities of each and just how much.

Overall, a good leader should have a sense of discernment so that they can take any quality they have and apply it to a particular situation as needed.

M.

🤔 Reducing clutter in my life?

Where can you reduce clutter in your life?

So, the prompt is “Where can you reduce clutter in your life?”. As a wife and mom of 12, this is so on par for me because anything in excess with a family my size is clutter. So, quarterly we do an entire overhaul. Kitchen, living room, bathrooms, and rooms. But as far as the children in addition to that, if they haven’t used it in a month- trash. If its been tucked away for 6 months- trash. If they have lost interest- trash.

And I know someone is going to say “how wasteful of you”. And to that I say…. bite me. 🤣

I give away what I can and really only buy what we need so its not as drastic as it sounds. I also indulge my children in their hobbies and ideas. But, you know children, given the space to expand and change their minds, they will. They don’t feel obligated to stick to something that no longer brings them joy.  It allows for growth and deeper learning of themselves.

Spoiled? Sure. On my dime and I do what I want sooooo… 🤷🏾‍♀️

If you’re not using it, its trash. Keeping in mind that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Just not through Goodwill. 🥴

M.

My mission

What is your mission?

I don’t know what my mission is. Half the time I’m questioning whether God even exists. I would like to leave a legacy but isn’t that vain? “I want to live a life that people will remember me”. You don’t find that suspicious? Im just living with the goal to make memories with the ones I love so that they have happy memories to get them through their grief. That’s it. If I make a trillion dollars I’d probably give it away. If I find myself poor, I’ll live in a box analyzing the decisions I made that got me there. So what is a mission for? Im not Ethan Hunt. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Just my two cents which by the way aren’t worth much because we canceled pennies. 🥴

Good question. Easy answer.

What would you do if you lost all your possessions?

If I lost all of my possessions, I would turn out even better than I am now, and that’s a pretty high bar.

See, I already lost all of my possessions once, and it taught me to have courage, strength, and audacity because no one is here to save you. People are not even obligated to help you.

First, you have to learn from your mishaps, what got you to the point of losing your possessions in the first place, and then learn from them. That means creating a strategy to keep it from happening again. I mean, who really knows how many lives we have already lived just to redo what we have done and possibly get it right this time. Is that what deja Vu is? (sp?)

This is how I know I will be better than I am now. I am a strategist. Even outside of certification, I am a natural strategist. I am always thinking and analyzing, even reconfiguring how something can be done differently, more effectively. I love it.

Now, this is not to say that I WANT to lose all of my possessions, just answering the call on WordPress and giving my opinion.

Take the value you need and discard the rest. ❤️