Black mothers hate their daughters 😒

Posted on by JustAskMaia

There is this deep-rooted question that [black] people dont ask but want to know the answer to.

Why are these mothers raising their daughters but loving their sons.

More directly, why are mothers so hard on their daughters but coddling their sons.

For a long time, I felt that. Many women attribute it to mothers being jealous of their daughters whilst being gentle on their sons and allowing them to be all over the place (both physically and emotionally).

When I was a single mother. I coddled the hell out of my boy as a single mother. So I thought I knew. I was like, yeah, we do do that. But maturing and now raising 12 children with a husband ( their father). I see this differently.

As a woman, a mom, I am made to be gentle, nurturing, loving, embracing, and encouraging. That’s what I do. But, with daughters, it’s not competition. It is being firm with my daughters so they don’t make my mistakes. I have wisdom now. But I talk to them and explain it. Some of our mothers didn’t know how to do that. Their love came out frustrated because they were scared for you. This world will eat our girls alive. I talk to my girls about every mistake I ever made, and I remind them that they will make some as well, probably repeating some of mine. But it’s okay, never feel like you can’t come to me and we will work it out. That’s how life works. But see, some of our mothers didn’t have that, so they don’t know what that looks like, and some of our mothers may still be traumatized by the stigmas placed on them because of their mistakes.

Having a husband and very present father shows me even more that I am doing it right. Because I do love on my boys hard. But their father is there to get them on the path to manhood. That’s not my job. I can teach my sons many things, but how to be his own man is not one of them. Sure, I can teach him to be the man I want…. read that again. I can give him the descriptions and attributes of what I believe a man should be, but that’s molding him into a man for a woman like me. What if that’s not the woman he wants?

I tell this story about my oldest.
I potty trained him, but I could not convince him to pee standing up (he was potty trained at 1). One day, a girlfriend of mine said her husband could watch him. I needed a sitter and usually wound up taking him to work. This man watched my son for 4 hours, and when I picked him up, he was standing and peeing. He said he only needed to show him 1x.

As a mother, it is my duty to raise my daughters and love my sons. It is my husband’s job to raise his sons and love his daughters. This is the beauty of family. It comes with balance. I never have to be told Happy fathers Day because I am a mom. Even when I was raising my boy, I was only capable of being his mom.

We have lost balance because of the bickering and anger of feeling dupes, excluded, and betrayed by a lover only to be left holding the diaper bag. It’s hard, I know. But we have to be open to playing our roles and allowing the other parent to play theirs. This is how we create well- rounded individuals to lead our future.

This is what self accountability looks like. And I’m sure someone will drag me or adamantly disagree, and that’s fine. But I’m not going to argue with you. If you disagree, share it with your own commentary.

This is my FAMILY thought for the day.
You’re welcome. ❤️

I tried to be lazy y’all.

Posted on by JustAskMaia

Listen. I love a shortcut just as much as the next person, but authenticity is so important to me, so some shortcuts are just not worth taking.

I have been having an amazing past couple of weeks, and that is why I haven’t been keeping up with the blog. If I’m being honest (always), I could have blogged, but I didn’t make it a priority like I should have.

If you’re new here, HI! 👋🏽 Like 👍🏽 comment 🗣 share 🫱🏼‍🫲🏿 subscribe 📍

I have been aiming to blog every Sunday, and I get really good about it until I don’t, then it’s hit or miss for a few weeks 🤦🏾‍♀️. Well, today, I was like, let me throw something I’m ai and blog that. Simple, painless, and I can go to bed. Chiiiiile 🙄. This is exactly why I teach my clients that ai will not replace them, but it CAN enhance them. This is what I asked ai to blog about..

“Blog what it’s like to have a successful consulting business, married, and having 12 children as a black woman living in South carolina. ” This is what it gave me.

Having a successful consulting business, being married, and having 12 children is not an easy feat for anyone. However, doing all of this as a black woman living in South Carolina comes with its own unique set of challenges.

Firstly, as a black woman entrepreneur, it can be difficult to gain the same level of respect that male or white entrepreneurs receive in the business world. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to build a successful consulting business, but it can be done with perseverance and determination.

When it comes to being a mother to 12 children, it takes a lot of organization and time-management skills to balance work and family life. It’s important to have a supportive spouse and community to help with childcare and household tasks. Being a working mother can be challenging, but it can also be rewarding to set an example for your children and show them the value of hard work and determination.

Living in South Carolina as a black woman can also come with its own challenges, as the state has a complicated history with race relations. It’s important to find a supportive community and surround yourself with like-minded people who will lift you up and support your success.

Despite the challenges that come with building a successful consulting business, raising a large family, and being a black woman living in South Carolina, it is still possible to achieve your goals. With hard work, dedication, and a strong support system, anything is possible.

🙄. Just 🙄. Cause 🤔. NO 😔. This sounds nothing like me and has no depth, not connection, no encouragement, just words. Now, don’t get me wrong. It’s good content but not personal.

It is very important to me that I resonate with my people. It’s hard sometimes being all the things to all the people so I try to share my journey as openly and honestly as possible in hopes to encourage and remind people that we all have our hiccups but keep pressing AND take rest. You can do both without choosing.

What you CAN’T do is try to be lazy and have someone or something do it for you because you don’t want to.

I love you like cousins. ❤️