Author: JustAskMaia

Between making the decision to put my children in school this year and pushing out thos new membership I have, there is a lot to do. Plus, I am actually sticking to my weight loss journey, so I am all over the place in a new way, and I am not sure I like it.

For those who don’t know, I have been homeschooling my crew since 2016, so most of my children have never seen the inside of a school, much less had to endure the doctrine that is school. They are super excited for the new adventure, but I have been hella focused on what this will look like because it’s confusing. All of the things they have taken out of curriculum and replaced especially as it pertains to Black people and America. I foresee that I will be taking them back out not too long after I put them in.

This is what homeschooling is about, though. Allowing the children to engross themselves into new experiences. To be honest, I’m sick about it. School is not what it used to ne and to top it off were in the south which, to me, means the education they will receive is subpar. That’s my opinion. But I have a backup plan in place.

As far as the new membership I am promoting, I have made some tweaks and added some perks, so it’s better than it was 100%. My goal is to get 25 people to sign up this month. If you want to read more about it, go to http://www.BecomingHabitual.com

My weight loss journey is coming along nicely. I am losing slowly, which is not ideal in my mind, but I know realistically it has its perks. It is more likely to stay off, and it reduces the likelihood of excess saggy skin. This is a fear of many overweight people, especially women, but I am preparing for it and ready to embrace it as a triumph.

What are you working on this month?

So I didn’t blog yesterday because I damn near slept all day. 😬

Okay, not really all day because one of my besties had a boss brunch, so I did get up for that, but we also had bottomless mimosas, so there’s that. When I got home, I grabbed Kera and laid down for a nap. I woke up once, and it was back to sleep for me. Perhaps they had melatonin in them. 🤔 Im tryna tell yall it was the best Sunday EVER!

I never know what I want to do on my birthday, wait, yes I do, it’s just never in the cards. For starters, I had a job interview today, yes, chile, a job interview because RCF isn’t bringing in enough for my liking, and I need some supplemental income cause I got big goals.

We were supposed to go to the little bitro just McRush and I but me being mister nice guy decided to bring the kids along so we went somewhere more economical, a buffet. Then we went to lowes for a part, and here I am back home, blogging. Ahhhh. The humdrum of parenting. 🙃

I don’t mind these days because I know better days are coming. We have a house in mind and business expansion, and that’s what I am focused on, not big spender birthday dinners.

I know I keep saying it, but foreal, I’m going back to school. I start in the fall. I am also putting the children in school, so it’s a lot going on come the fall, but I am ready. I truly believe that I thrive netter in organized chaos. So keep me in prayer because here goes nothing.

Hey. Let’s talk about why you don’t reach your goals.
You are setting them wrong. Most of the time, you set an outcome as a goal. When you do this, you get flustered when you don’t reach it. You get upset because what you’re doing isn’t getting to the goal. You get lost in not knowing what to do to reach the goal.
The problem is not the goal. The problem is not you. The problem is not the work or loss of motivation. The problem is you are going about it wrong.

If you set a goal to lose weight, then what? You have to figure out what to eat, when to eat, count calories, what exercises to do, when to do them, and how often
And all of this is true. You will need to do all of this anyway. But that’s the thing. When you do all of this with losing weight as the goal, you will get discouraged the moment you miss an exercise, eat the wrong thing, and the scale didn’t go down. And that is the problem. See, the reason you get so easily discouraged is because you did not see the result you wanted by the end of the day; lose weight.
Losing weight was never the goal. Losing weight is the result of the goal.
It’s all in the why. WHY do you want to lose weight. That’s the key.  I want to feel better about myself. I want to be able to play with my children without being out of breath. I want to walk up the stairs without my knee hurting. Those are the goals. These are what you call smart goals. Specific measurable attainable realistic timely.
Doing your goals this way will help keep you motivated BECAUSE your discipline is not stressed because of lack of it. Every day that you work out, you will feel better about yourself, goal #1 accomplished. This will create the urge to repeat the process until you see the result: weight loss. This ideology can be applied to anything you want to do, plus it simplifies the steps so it’s less guess work and more action.

I had this epiphany about myself today. I thought I’d share in case it brings you as much clarity as it brought me. 😉

Today my sister wanted me to go to the beach with her. I hate the beach. It’s dirty and overcrowded, not to mention I have to keep an eye out for the babies of mine who think that they can swim. 🙄 But we went, and the kids enjoyed themselves. My mom and dad were in town, so it was a good family outing. The highlight of my day, though, was my best friend asked me to come over, and we haven’t hung out in forever, so I definitely was game.

It was a much needed break from everyday life. We talked for hours about our goals and fears, our ambitions, and what holds us back. We laughed and almost cried. I forgot how good it feels to just be able to talk without the constant interruptions of mom or phones ringing. I definitely need to do this more often. Not the beach, though, because eww, sand.

I have to remember to step away from the obligations of serving and show up for me.

People with a scarcity mindset do the craziest things. They oftentimes think that what they do is helping them, but in the long run its really hurting them. That’s the thing, though. They can not see beyond their now. Do you have a scarcity mindset?

Do you often buy things in overabundance telling yourself it’s just in case?

Do you save things you no longer need, but they are really unnecessary or easily accessible to purchase?

Do you hide your favorite things even from people you love?

Do you buy things you have no need for right now?

Do you find yourself spending hours doing a project that is not on your to-do list?

Do you forget to do things you were adamant that they needed to get done?

Do you procrastinate and spend way too much time doing frivolous things like watching your phone or playing games?

Do you shrug off compliments and thank yous, giving a reason instead of a thank you?

If you answered yes to at least 3 if this, then it’s likely that you have a scarcity mindset. It’s more than likely that your scarcity mindset stems from a trauma response from feeling deprived at one point in your life, more than likely, your childhood. It’s not really because you are lazy or selfish, not even that you are not dependable to fulfill even your own dreams but because you feel unworthy deep down.

People with a scarcity it’s mindset are unable to plan for their future, even though they desire to, because they can not see the future. They live in a constant reminder state that the future, for them, is not great. Again, trauma response.

As children, they more than likely lived in squalor as parents may have struggled. They were teased in school for not having what others had or even not smelling the best. Perhaps even coming from a single parent household. While none of this is their fault, and they may know it, it’s is still perpetuated in their everyday thoughts and actions. Most don’t even realize it.

It’s hard to even see that it’s happening, and they will be in denial, and it’s even harder to break. If you are like this, I want you to know that you are worthy. I want you to know that your childhood struggles are not your fault. They are no ones fault. You may have had parents who didn’t know better or even know that they deserved better. They could have been suffering from depression, illness, or disability or even worse, some type of addiction. They were worthy but couldn’t see past the life they were in. You are worthy because you are here now to change the course of your life for the better.

You are loved even if you don’t see it now. It’s likely because you blocked it out. Or you don’t think you deserve a life you saw other people have growing up. But it’s there.

You are appreciated even if you don’t hear it as often as you’d like.

The thing is, you have to know you are worthy. You have to love yourself. You have to appreciate yourself especially for how far you have come.

Releasing a scarcity mindset is not easy, but it is possible. I implore you to talk to someone, a friend, a spouse, a therapist, or even the mirror. If you don’t speak with someone, you will continue to repeat the curse. That’s what it is, a curse. You don’t have to carry it around. You can let it go. You can be happy. You deserve to be happy and not feel guilty about it.

❤️

So, I am going to try to speak to text. I am currently working on some success work for this new membership coming up on rush consulting fine. I am also trying to type up some lesson plans as well as print out some school work for Bella and Isaiah. While I am sitting on my bed trying to drink this water..I have a ton of things going on right now and I really am trying to be disciplined in blogging so here I am talking it out and of course I’m going to have to go back and put in the proper punctuations but this is what you get for right now. I do not have much to check in with. I have been extremely busy with the becoming habitual sessions that start June 1st. I am still trying to get the children to get their work done for the last bit of this school year so that I can give them exit exams. Bella wants to do dual enrollment for college and high school classes? So we are also trying to prepare for that? In addition to her business that she started, we are trying to get that up and legitimize. We are also in the process of hiring 2 new people at the firm, and we are training McRush on some more technical details so that we can. Extend our reach in the technical world. If that’s not enough, we are also slowly transitioning to minimizing a lot of stuff in the house so that we can make the. Move that we’ve been longing to make for years. We finally found a house that is definitely huge enough for us, if not more, but there is so much that we need as far as space for running additional. Portions of the business. That includes the print shop as well, so there’s a lot going on in a little bit of time. I’m trying to take it all in mama needs a vacation. I’m tired. I am in class, I am prepping class, I am learning, I am reading, I sleepy. On the plus side my children are healthy. We did get a letter stating that our insurance would be cut off because we no longer meet certain criteria or whatever the case may be, so I need to call them. And see what’s going on with that because it took us years to be convinced that we need to get insurance and not pay out of pocket, and it’s been slightly easier as the children get older especially the boys because they tend to hurt themselves more often which means we go to the emergency room more often so we. Definitely need the insurance like we didn’t think that we did, so I have to also deal with that. In addition, my brother is seeking custody of Charles, which you all know is my nephew whom I’m had since birth. But I’m perfectly fine with that. He’s older, and my brother got himself together. I haven’t a problem with that. The problem is that the courts want to give us the run around, so we can’t seem to get a proper court date to get this all situated and done. I would hope that we can get this done by the end of the year so I will no longer be known as a dozen and a cousin it will just be my dozen, and that’s fine.

Alright. Let me get back to work. Love ya 😘