Starting new is hard. Not necessarily for you making the decision and the transition but for those that are around you, grew up with you, or even raised you.
No matter the shift, it is bound to take a toll on you and loved ones. Haters too.
Most of you know the many aspects of my life and shifts accordingly. Because let’s face it, I’m probably the most transparent person you know. I chose to be this way so that you wouldn’t be afraid to be. Knowing that against all odds you will come out victorious but you must always choose you.
What am I talking about. Well, lets take a trip down memory lane.
But before we do, I hate that people feel the need to keep me in the dark. One thing about me is I know I’m one of Gods favorites because I know how to tap into all the gifts he has given me. I know the plan before its set in motion. Being a loner and heart driven advocate for people I have learn to read the truth BEFORE it slaps you in the face.
Now. Memory lane.
Remember when I was raising my niece? And then got custody of her brother, my nephew? That’s what took me to 10 children before I birthed 10 children. Well initially it was a big thing within the family. I had legal custody and would not give them back because so. Eventually I caved and can only pray that no harm comes to them under my custody yet under another roof. That is above me now. I did so to keep the peace. You know me, little peace maker.
Although everyone knew that what I did was the right thing, I was still the bad guy because it forced them to pick sides and since I was least prone to argue with anyone, that automatically made me the easy target. God, my heart hurts thinking about it. Like most families, we never got over it, we simply moved past it. That’s a horrible thing to do. Where there is no healing there can never be pure love.
I have overcome a lot of things and can proudly say both broke me down and built me up. I am stronger in spirit but weaker in trust. While have decided to ditch the old me of pure compassion and care and guard my heart, I am still judged by what people perceived of, heard about, or judged me by.
Be encourage you to press on. Your change will not be easy but I assure you, it will be worth it.
I am still the bad guy but to me, I will always be my hero.
