There is no possible way we can ever have a serious conversation. I declare my children are the biggest goofballs ever. As we try to educate Sai on the differences in problem solving via division and multiplication we cannot help but giggle at our pointless jokes and jesters as we poke fun about the situation. Its a wonder my children are as smart and focused as they are because we can barely keep a straight face around here. It is much fun though. That brings me to my next point, well my first point.
Today while perusing through Facebook, which is my first mistake, I came across a video someone posted but it was a repost; It was a mother beating her daughter. Now, I am not talking about a toddler getting spanked or a tween being reprimanded. I am speaking of a teenager about 16 getting something that didn’t look much like a belt swatted on her, not at her, ON her. It was the most demeaning post I have stumbled upon in a long time. This woman was cussing at this young lady while constantly calling her a b*t**. At no point in time did she seem to be doing this in her best interest. She was speaking in a very angry tone as if she were a slave master.
I truly wish that my people would stop abusing their children in this manner, or any manner. It is pointless and counterproductive to raising strong human beings. It made me sick to watch it because although she told the young lady numerous times to turn around it was very clear that she had no intention of hitting her on her behind. She slammed the object across her head so many times it was horrible to watch. I could not watch past the vulgarity and lack of embracing the moment of teaching. However when I showed it to McRush, we forwarded it to the end to see how long the embarrassment was. To our surprise and disgust there was a very young boy watching and recording. WHAT!? So not only are you subjecting you daughter to accept this type of “love” but you are teaching your son to give it? This is a sick and twisted world we live in.
Why would you teach your daughter that this type of abuse and humiliation is okay? You as a mother are her first teacher and role model. I have learned that women who do this are often filled with inner aggression, aggravation, self hate, and rejection and they take it out on people both verbally and physically. It is sad. Some of us are not ready to be parents because we are unwilling to see where we need to change and grow. It saddens my heart that this young lady, whatever she may have done, is learning that her just punishment should be harsh and in this knowledge she will continue to make mistakes and will never learn to use her better judgement but instead continue the cycle until someone forces her otherwise.
We need to teach our babies that in life we will make mistakes, we will always make mistakes, and that’s okay but what is important is not only that we learn from them and do better next time but that we also take time out to encourage someone else to make better decisions as well.
It is a vicious cycle that dates back to slavery, the Jim Crow era. Beating was a form of submission and to beat the dignity and self respect out of them and many of us do it today. And while I understand that the same method may not work for each child, trust me, I know with my 9 babies however this type of beating is for the scum of the streets and that is not how we should treat our children.
I am not here to pass judgement, just knowledge.