I do not know what to say. I remember the stories my grandmother used to tell me about the coming of the last and evil days. I also remember my mother telling me the same thing. Not too long ago I was telling my son the same thing. And today the evil has made its presence ever so prevalent. I suppose in hindsight it has been here all along. I have never seen a man take his last breath of life, yesterday I saw two. Senseless as it may be it is only the beginning of even worse evil to come.
Last night, after seeing Philando Castile and Alton Sterling take in their last breath and release its counterpart, the reality became more, realistic. When my husband leaves for work he may not return. When my son leaves for school he may not come home. There is currently a standing order in my home and that is, no one leaves out of my site until further notice. Even I may leave and never return home again.
Something has to give, someone has to give! It took a lot for me not to cry myself to sleep but I am not normally an emotional person (I used to be but life has hardened me a little). Crying is not logical. All of the cryings in the world will not bring these men back or these women. They senselessly and unapologetically lost their lives because they were black, period. They continue to try and explain them away by bringing up their past or systematically call out lies like, “he’s got a gun” or “Don’t grab my gun”, or “Stop resisting”. Lies. Sadly we are becoming desensitized to all of this going on around us until someone we know and love becomes the next target; the next victim. I don’t want to die like that. Honestly, I don’t want to die at all but that isn’t happening.
Today I have decided to shift my focus. I have always believed that black people should own their own businesses or at the very least if you have to work, do what you want not accept whatever you can get. I always stand on the platform of ‘You Can’ because you can but now You MUST. It is imperative to take back your dollars by taking back your communities. Take back your families and take back your lives. I will no longer be passive with my tactics of stepping up. STEP UP. Take charge of your life and all that you own even if it be just the clothes on your back, or less. Stop settling for life and live life. It is time to stop sitting in your living room blaming someone else and Stand up! Step UP!
My heart has been beating double time since seeing these men gunned down and murdered in cold blood and even though these lynchings, yes I said lynchings have been happening for many years, we are now in the era of technology and now what has been happening in the dark is now coming to light. I do not believe that some police suddenly have the urge to kill and destroy black men; I believe it has been part of the agenda for many years and many more years to come. Let us not forget that policing originated specifically to keep the black race feeling inferior by harassing and beating them in their place. Unfortunately, it’s worse than that. What’s worse than that you ask? The facts that we inadvertently have succumbed to maintain the mentality of the former day slaves when the Jim Crow letter was written to keep us separate by complexion. What foolishness and how foolish of us to continue to allow this hatred and anger and bitterness to seep into our very souls to the point where we as women cannot complement one another on our daily walks of like, or where our brothers are constantly plotting and scheming against their very own. What madness we have created by passing it down to our children to continue this vicious cycle of self-hatred and mass destruction of our own people. Shame on you! Shame on me! Shame on us!
Even in this moment of murders by government officials, we refuse to stand united. Why?
I implore you to take a look in the mirror and take inventory of what you can do to better not just your life but the lives of the people around you. What can you do?
While this is not just a black issue it begins with us and I assure you that it needs to end with us.
So I ask you again, what are you going to do?