With a large family like mine, you would think that there is no shortage of family time. And, while, for the most part, we do activities together there is a big disconnect that can bring up arguing and bickering. The feeling of not connecting or everyone really getting to know one another.
I attribute this to the overwhelming dependence of electronics. McRush and I definitely spoil our crew so its surely on us. Mostly me. When I see something I think the RushBunch would like, I’m pressed to get it. Whether its clothes, games, vacations, or electronics.
I suppose, in some way, I feel a sense of guilt for having 12 children. I always want to make sure they don’t feel loved or appreciated. This is more than likely from the pressures and whispers of friends, family, and even strangers, that “there is no way those children are getting enough love with that many children”.
I’m a giver. I give every part of me and that includes my pockets.
We have family night on Fridays and monthly family trips. But it doesnt feel like enogh to me. I am constantly loving on them. I talk to them one-on-one. I (probably) overshare. And yes, I buy them whatever they want. We even have one-on-one lunch dates.
The problem with this, asside of me being drained in every way, is that I fear I have created Takers. And while much of this could be a compilation of them growing up and finding themselves in addition to them being regular teenagers, they bicker A LOT. So much so that it feels, to me, like having an aversion towards one another. Though not disrespectful to myself or their father.
So, starting this month, today, McRush and I have implemented the following.
Now, while they do share time together, the dependency on their electronics has placed a bit of a stain on their relationships. This is my resolve, agreed to by McRush. I thought I’d share in case anyone else needed it.
Things To Do
Tea party with the girls.
Play football with the boys.
Go for a walk with 2+ people
Play a family board game.
Get to know a sibling better
Play jump rope
Play hopscotch
Go skating together
Go for a bike ride with someone
Go skating outside
Play cards
Start (and finish) a chapter book with a little
Write your grandparents a letter
Volunteer for a neighbor
Teach someone something of value
Organize an area of the house
Do a chore for a sibling
Practice your signatures together
Do an art project with a little
Draw with someone
Color together
Teach someone a new dance
Create a handshake
Wash the cars together
Tell someone 5 things that you like about them
Journal with someone
Walk the Milo with someone
Have lunch with someone
Have a friendly competition
Do a chore together
Help someone reach a new goal
Create a ritual/habit together
Meditate with someone
Give out hugs and gratitude
Fix a family meal
Build something together
Share your hopes and dreams with someone
Create a new dish together
(You may create a group idea to be approved by parents)
Each of these quests should be dedicated a minimum of 15 minutes. No arguing or bickering, just calm resolve. You are required to do a minimum of three (3) per day. Failure to do so will result in the forfeiture of your electronics for 24 hours 1st offense, 48 hours the 2nd offense, 1 week your 3rd . Failure to cooperate will result in 30 days of forfeiture.
Electronics include TVs, laptops, switches, phones, iPad, and electric scooters.
-Mom & Dad
What do you think? Am I overthinking? Are my expectations too high? Let me know in the comments and feel free to share. ❤️
JustAskMaia 