Everyone knows I am the passive one who doesn’t mind the children running around, drawing on wall (with chalk) and not having a bed time. Even the children which is not necessarily a good thing.
Being so close to D day, my tolerance level is at about a -3. Today, for the first time in forever, McRush was off work and honey I took FULL advantage of it. I stayed locked in my room until two o clock. 😇
There was structure and cleaning and cries of not-getting-my-way. And you know what? I had no compassion at all.
I recently had a moment of sadness and I told my sister who suggested a resolve I am not really feeling but honestly have been considering myself.
Sending them to school. PUBLIC school.
I literally struggle with this. I feel like I am failing my children by putting them into the school to prison cycle. But at the same time, I feel like I may be failing them by not giving them the best of me.
Today I realized after many years of marriage, that I really need to let Daddy handle more and stop running to their aid. Its not beneficial to them.or me. When dad chastise the children I always swoop in and be like “awe baby”. Nah, its time for some “awe me”. I’m over it.
Well, that was my moment. I hope you find comfort in knowing you are not alone when you struggle being mom. We all do.
iRush